Male VS. Female At The ATM Machine

taureauAugust 11, 2007


A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:

"Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.

Customers using this new facility are

requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.

After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed. Please follow the Appropriate steps for your gender."



1. Drive up to the cash machine.

2. Put down your car window.

> 3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

6. Put window up.

7. Drive off.



Unfortunately, most of this part is the Truth.!!!!

1. Drive up to cash machine.

2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.

3. Set parking brake, put the window down.

4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.

5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.

6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.

8. Insert card.

9. Re-insert card the right way.

  1. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.

  2. Enter PIN.

  3. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

  4. Enter amount of cash required.

  5. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

  6. Retrieve cash and receipt.

  7. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.

  8. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.

  9. Re-check makeup.

  10. Drive forward 2 feet.

  11. Reverse back to cash machine.

  12. Retrieve card.

  13. Re-empty hand bag, locate card

holder, and place card into the slot provided!

  1. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.

  2. Restart stalled

engine and pull off.

  1. Redial person on cell phone.

  2. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

  3. Release Parking Brake.

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oh puhleeze - you are itching for a fight, aren't you??

    Bookmark   August 12, 2007 at 7:52AM
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carla17(Z7 NC)

pagan, LOL

this is not the male pig forum

    Bookmark   August 12, 2007 at 5:06PM
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yuck yuck I really mean it yuuck!

    Bookmark   August 13, 2007 at 12:09AM
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I've seen this before. It was forwarded to a group of us females in an email by one of the most competent woman I know.

We thought it was funny. And, honestly, I could certainly see myself and other women I know in that. We could identify. You have to be able to laugh at yourself a bit.

However, they abbreviated the male behavior a bit too much. It should be changed after #5.

6. Ring the teller to let him/her and everyone else within earshot know that the account balance is off by $0.03 and it couldn't possibly be your fault.

7. Demand to speak to a manager regarding your $0.03. You're not leaving until this is resolved.

8. After being advised to come in to sort out the issue, throw your car into drive, gun the gas, and squeal away from the drive-thru ATM, yelling angrily the entire time.

    Bookmark   August 14, 2007 at 8:46PM
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