Another update on Robyn ! I'm really angry !!!

zeffyrose_pa6b7(6b7)December 5, 2008

Robyn had the movers last Friday for the big items but she has been trying to move the smaller things .---Bob and I try to help but we are almost two hours away.

Yesterday she stopped at the house to pick up more things and Rick was there with the LOCKSMITH changing the locks--

For the past 15 months since he left Robyn has never stopped him and he has been in and out of the house.

Of course Robyn was very upset----I don't think it is legal for him to do this----He has been negligent getting his financial records to Robyn's lawyer so the divorce can proceed.

I just can't understand why he is being so cruel-----He lies to the children and that is sad.

Robyn is willing to do whatever is best for the kids ------

Rick wants to buy the house and Robyn feels that is best for the kids because the house and the upkeep would be too much for her.

Melissa is still angry and hasn't done anything to help Robyn move---the middle son is away at college and Rick is just using the younger boy to hurt Robyn

It has been a terrible year.

Can't wait till the divorce is final and Robyn can move on with her life.

Just wanted to check in---sure was hoping to have happier news----maybe things will get moving along now that Robyn's lawyer is aware of what Rick has been doing.

Hope everyone is OK.

Florence

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AnneCecilia z5 MI

Florence, I can certainly understand your anger. Why is it people try to use the children as weapons? Your soon-to-be ex SIL should be ashamed of himself. I've seen it before with friends of ours: even teenagers have a hard time coping with an ugly divorce of their parents and take a long time putting it in perspective. I hope your family can find some peace during the holidays,

Anne

    Bookmark   December 5, 2008 at 7:59PM
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opheliathornvt zone 5

I'm so terribly sorry for all of you. What an awful situation for everyone in your family.

    Bookmark   December 6, 2008 at 11:21AM
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theroselvr

Florence, I'm really sorry this isn't resolved yet and continues to bring her pain. I'm sure that watching it is very hard on you, you probably feel so helpless.

Divorce sucks and the fact that it was him that wanted it and is now turning the kids against her is a huge slap in the face, I have some choice names for him, but surely can't put them here.

Is she in PA? If she was in NJ, I have an awesome attorney. My guy would probably have him in contempt of something by now.
You ask, if it's legal for him to do this. Probably. I don't know the specifics but sounds like she is getting an apartment & he is keeping the house, and when she called the truck to come, he probably figured she was almost done. I actually would do the same thing, especially if I was moving back in, which it sounds like he is doing. The thing is, he could have said that he needed her out by such & such and after that she'd need to make arrangements to get in due to the locks, but who knows, maybe he's afraid she would lock him out?

IMO, Robyn is probably better off to just get her stuff and go. The sooner she does that, the sooner what ever kids will stay with him can get settled and if I'm right, they will see all too soon exactly who they should have lived with (not him.)

Kids are strange. As you know I'm divorced twice; there's been times my son stood up for his dead beat instead of me, or my girl did so. Now that it's been years, the truth has come out and they know who was lying and who wasn't. It's funny how my girl is now remembering everything.

Robyn has to learn to forgive the kids for what is going on now, as much as it hurts. Even though it sounds like they are older, they're still feeling this and probably don't know what to believe.

Everything will work out in the end, it's just going to take time to get there.

Rick will get his eventually. Karma is like that.

    Bookmark   December 6, 2008 at 12:00PM
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harryshoe zone6 eastern Pennsylvania

Florence,
Try to thing positive thoughts. Christmas, roses and your garden next spring. Robyn will be fine. This is just a bump in the road which will make her stronger in the end.

Take care.

Harry

    Bookmark   December 10, 2008 at 11:00AM
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zeffyrose_pa6b7(6b7)

Thanks for all your kind thoughts---

I spent a few days with Robyn last week----

Her DH is just plain cruel----lying to the kids etc---He would not let Robyn in the house which is against the law---He is supposed to give her a key but so far she doesn't have one----He even told their 15 year old son not to let us in.

Supposedly her lawyer is working on this case but there are so many unanswered questions.

It is so difficult because we are almost 2 hours from Lancaster--

It is breaking our hearts----

Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

Florence

    Bookmark   December 15, 2008 at 7:27PM
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zeffyrose_pa6b7(6b7)

Can't believe how cruel this man is----

A couple of months ago Robyn's Golden Retriever became very ill---lost control of her bowels and other problems---She finally made the very painful decision to put her to sleep---She told Rick and the kids what had to be done. No one was helping her care for Cordie.

Now Rick is telling the kids that she put the dog to sleep too soon and the kids are angry----What more is he going to do to try and destroy my daughter.

This along with other lies he has told them has been very painful for all of us.

Robyn of course is devastated.

I don't understand why he doesn't move along with the divorce and get it overwith.

Prayers and thoughts would be appreciated.

Thanks, Florence

    Bookmark   December 19, 2008 at 10:57AM
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theroselvr

You know Florence, my ex did almost the same thing with our dog.

I was unemployed when he was removed from the house, found out I had no money, he cleaned out the bank accounts before I had him removed. I managed to find a part time job, it wasn't much to feed 2 kids and a dog. I don't know how I managed.

I used to beg him to take the dog; he refused. Eventually he agreed, it was written into our divorce but he never took her. No one would adopt her; it was so hard. I did everything I could before turning to a Shepard rescue in PA.

Bringing her there broke my heart. She was a great dog, got her as a puppy when my daughter was a year old. My kids were upset (rightfully so) but since my boy was older, he understood more, my girl did not.

My ex told my daughter I had her put to sleep and that he would have taken her had I asked him. Took over 5 years for my daughter to believe me, but now that she's older, she's remembering things and knows I would never just get rid of our dog. She now remembers him coming to our new house, me bringing our dog out with her stuff, him playing with her, then leaving, the dog chased his truck down the street.

Amazing how he's getting over, especially with Robyn's kids being older; my kids were under 10.

Karma.

Tell Robyn she isn't alone.
Maybe she can find a message board to vent on?
Citydata has various forums, state, relationships & parenting. She might feel better if she can vent some anonymously.

    Bookmark   December 20, 2008 at 12:11PM
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carla17(Z7 NC)

Florence, I have always believed what goes around comes around. That, with karma included tells me Robyn's ex will someday get his just rewards. How ugly. I've never been divorced but know it can be rough. Sounds like he is a real piece of work. Tell Robyn your friends are wishing her well.
Merry Christmas to you and Bob!

Carla

    Bookmark   December 21, 2008 at 4:34PM
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sammy zone 7 Tulsa

I am so sorry that this trauma has not ended. You really need to take care of yourself, and heal. I know your daughter needs to do the same thing. I hope you all have a good Christmas, and things get settled soon.

Sammy

    Bookmark   December 21, 2008 at 5:29PM
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