red-neck valentine's love poem

ronald(Z5 MI)February 8, 2007

Collards is green my dog's name is Blue

and I'm so lucky to have a sweet thang like you.

Yore hair is like cornsilk a-flapping in the breeze

Softer than Blue's and without all them fleas.

You move like the bass, which excite me in May.

You ain't got no scales but I luv you anyway.

Yo're as satisfy'n as okry jist a-fry'n in the pan.

Yo're as fragrant as "snuff" right out of the can.

You have som'a yore teeth, for which I am proud;

I hold my head high when we're in a crowd.

On special occasions, when you shave under yore arms,

well, I'm in hawg heaven, and awed by yore charms.

Still them fellers at work, they all want to know,

what I did to deserve such a purdy, young doe.

Like a good roll of duct tape yo're there fer yore man,

to patch up life's troubles and fix what you can.

Yo're as cute as a junebug a-buzzin' overhead.

You ain't mean like those far ants I found in my bed.

Cut from the best cloth like a plaid flannel shirt,

you spark up my life more than a fresh load of dirt.

When you hold me real tight like a padded gunrack,

my life is complete; Ain't nuttin' I lack.

Yore complexion, it's perfection, like the best vinyl sidin'.

despite all the years, yore age, it keeps hidin'.

Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie with a RC cold drank,

we go together like a skunk goes with stank.

Some men, they buy chocolate for Valentine's Day;

They git it at Wal-Mart, it's romantic that way.

Some men git roses on that special day

from the cooler at Kroger. "That's impressive," I say.

Some men buy fine diamonds from a flea market booth.

"Diamonds are forever," they explain, suave and couth.

But for this man, honey, these won't do. Cause yo're too special, you sweet thang you.

I got you a gift, without taste nor odor, more useful than diamonds...

It's a new Troll'n Motor

Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo
GawdinFever(z5b/St. Louis, MO)

Can 't say as I've ever had anyone sound THAT suave and couth! LOL

Thanks for the laugh!

    Bookmark   February 8, 2007 at 8:04PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo
bogartbaby(z8 SC)

ROFLMAO,thanks Ron!!!!!

    Bookmark   February 10, 2007 at 9:10AM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo
schmily(z6 VA)

Ah Ron - you smooth tongued devil. That brings tears to my eyes (tears of laughter of course). :D

    Bookmark   February 10, 2007 at 2:47PM
Sign Up to comment
More Discussions
Green mildew on soil of WS containers?
Last year, I WSd in styrofoam cups that were placed...
A different category for winter sowing!
You may not think of cacti as needing winter sowing,...
Official Winter Sowing Count Zone Wars 2014-2015 #2:
Game of Zone 2014-2015 Link:This is the continuation...
Anyone has started winter sowing in Toronto?
This is my second year doing winter sowing. I started...
Extreme cold predicted and my seeds have sprouted
I have WS cabbage sprouting here in Zone 7, but Sunday...
Sponsored Products
Full 200TC Embroidered Hem Sheet Set - WHITE/GOLD
$146.90 | Horchow
Red Watercolor Ottoman
$149.99 | zulily
Uttermost Colobraro Crackled Smoke Gray Table Lamp
Lamps Plus
C and F Enterprises Adirondacks Bedding Set - CFID210
$139.99 | Hayneedle
Mythical Wall Sconce
Zuo Modern Quixote Side Table in Antique
Beyond Stores
5' Red Cedar Royal Sweetheart Highback Porch Swing
Parker Pendant
People viewed this after searching for:
© 2015 Houzz Inc. Houzz® The new way to design your home™