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Turning down an offer

Posted by karyn1 MD 7 ( on
Fri, Feb 23, 07 at 7:15

Does anyone else feel bad when they turn down an offer or is it just me? I've posted a number of plants and seeds, sometimes with a specific request, other times with "make an offer". I've had offers for things that I really didn't want but felt bad and traded anyway. That's usually if I have an abundance of what I have listed for trade. With some plants/seeds I have a very limited amount and don't want to trade it for something that I don't want, then I feel bad. Does anyone else feel that way when they turn down a trade when you have said make an offer?

Follow-Up Postings:

RE: Turning down an offer

Yes Karyn, I do also, but sometimes the things offered to me, just won't tropicals, or things that are not hardy to my area, or no ID iris (have lots of those already), Or no ID hosta (chances are I already have it), daylilies (the same) etc,etc,etc...or I have had it b4 and shovel pruned it, or it did not like to live at my house, or my neighbor will give me some if I just take the time to go get it.

If they are requesting some things I have an abundance of or don't mind disturbing, I will occasionally (time allowing) maybe let them have something for postage...with postage paid up front, and I warn them that I will only be shipping when I find the spare time. More than once when I offered for postage, they said they really couldn't afford what does that tell you? Chances are they could not have afforded to trade either. I'd rather send the plants for postage, than be out the money to ship plants in exchange for something I didn't want/need. Chances are that if I don't want it need it, there is a pretty good reason.

I'm so looking forward to growing the many seed goodies you sent me...twice.

Thank you again.


RE: Turning down an offer

You should not feel guilty about turning down a trade. If I get turned down, I assume there were a lot of other people requesting before me, or simply that my plants won't work out for you. The same applies when someone emails you separately although you haven't even posted a trade.

RE: Turning down an offer

I feel bad too and when I first traded I said yes to everyone whether I wanted it or not so I wouldn't hurt feelings but that's not good. Trading is about everyone being happy and that didn't do it. I've had people try to make me take theirs by being rude and crude but them I just delete. At first I also got hurt feelings if I didn't get the courtesy of a reply, now I just think everyone has more to do and I'll hear from them if I have what they want. It's not being rude. I do find it less than mannerly when I send something for postage or at my expense and don't even get an, "I got it."


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