need a new life

susan123-2009

14 years ago

I need a new life and don't know how to get one My son left for Iraq the end of June and the same time my husband of 33 years went off the deep end He has Bi Polar and became out of control and became my cxaptive for the last five or more years He wouldnt give me second without standing over me and degrading me he wouldnt even let me leave my house and in the end he became violent and was choking me only to lie good enough that even I stopped calling the law but in the end he was hauled off to jail only to go to a residential treatment facility how fair is that I got stuck with all the problems he left behind including finacial while he has no worries or responsiblities dont know how to pick up the pieces and most days dont even want to try any ideas please give me time if i try to make a trade and drop off for a while pray for my son when the olivia soldier died we all thought it was one of our guys but he drilled near mpls mn and not in our units just from the town but he was still one of our guys to me god speed him to heaven for my son is still safe for one more day

Comments (5)

chrizty
14 years ago
Its hard to start over when you yourself didnt choose to.
its takes time, but you'll get there.:) im going through somthing like you right are now. there are some days seems like your just stuck in a hole n cant get out. dont let those days get to ya [eaiser said than done] ok try not to let those days get to ya! lol.
medontdo
14 years ago
i will keep your son in my prayers! and you! i know its really hard to see the light at the end of a long tunnel sometimes. i know this. on a very different level then you! but take it all one day at a time. and when that doesn't work take it one hour at a time. that is the only thing that has helped me these last few months. and LOTS of praying!! **smiles** Many ((Hugs)) ~Medo
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graanieb
14 years ago
Dear Susan, you need our prayers for your son, you and family...don't know who you have around now, take it one hour at a time as Medo said or 1 minute at a time -as I've been doing it at times.
Prayers and hugs.
Bea
susan123-2009
Original Author
14 years ago
today is real hard i feel like i am suffacating and like letting the darkness have its way everyone has chosen to be on the side of the animal and even my own mother guess they are no longer my family but his after 33 years holding on seems to far out on a limb and i cant reach that today but somehow i have to for the kids esp kevin my soldier thanks for your thoughts and prarers they help to keep me tough
medontdo
14 years ago
just remember, you have friends here!! ((HUGS)) i know that sometimes it is really hard. for a while, i was really mad at my mom, i hit depression really hard, i was really close to the bottom, and hubs and i were always fighting, and i couldn't understand why, i thought it was always him, he knew it wasn't him, he told me it was me. OF course i knew it wasn't me, duhhhh!! (grin) after months of this and almost a divorce and wanting to literally kill my hubs, but of course i could never do something like that, but something in me was way off, we made an apt, and they said i was bipolar. we did all these meds. well we ended up going to another doc, the one i had to go to for having my baby, and he took really good care of me, he said you arent because you don't go for days without sleeping, but otherwise youd' be. so he put me on pristiq. now i'm MUCH better!!! YAYYYYYY now i'm much happier again and the same ol me again, smiling and loving again. WHEW!!! and yes i love my mom again!! LOL
and of course i'm going back to church again so that helps me too. **big smile** i will surely keep you and your son in my prayers. take it an hour at a time. if that's what it takes. ~medo