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Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

Posted by milehighgirl CO USDA 5B/Sunset 2B (My Page) on
Sat, Mar 23, 13 at 19:11

This is highly embarrassing but I just finally need to vent a little. My long awaited order from Tierra Madre was stolen from my porch. I just can't shake the blues about it. To be very honest I actually think it was one of my sons who disposed of them. After repeated attempts to get him to be on a schedule, to look for a job, and to apply for college I just took the router away along with his keyboard. (Knowing he could just hook his computer up to the modem).

My trees had arrived and I was getting ready to pot them up to keep them till the weather was warmer, then that night they just disappeared from my porch. I don't live in an area that usually has thefts and we had had a tiny dusting of snow that night. The only footprints were from my house to the car. Ugh, I can't believe I'm baring my soul here!

Anyway, I really would like to replace them but no one has what I want now. I guess I have to wait another year but boy am I heartbroken.

Here is what I had ordered:

Fondante de Moulins Lille on OHF 97
Belle Lucrative on OHF 97
Gold Dust on Lovell
Old Mixon Free on Lovell
Panamint on Lovell
Baby Crawford on Lovell

The only tree I can probably replace this time of year is the Baby Crawford, but what I am really heartbroken about are the pears.

Anyone know where I can find these anywhere else this time of year? I ordered these last September! Chris at Tierra Madre said he would see if they had any more but I haven't heard back from him and it's been a month.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

  • Posted by ericwi Dane County WI (My Page) on
    Sat, Mar 23, 13 at 19:30

Sorry to hear about your trees. A few days before Christmas, I had ordered a pair of winter boots for my wife, and I was watching the order progress on the tracking web-site that Fedex provides. The boots arrived when we were out shopping, but not at our house. Wherever they landed, the person who received them seems to have decided to keep them. It took 6 weeks and half a dozen phone calls to get my account credited, finally. Bah, humbug. There must be some place with a few trees to sell this spring, I think you just have to be persistent. Sorry about the loss, though.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

Sounds like the real heartbreak involves your son. Very sorry to hear of such a torn relationship with your child.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

1. Don't blame anyone unless you witnessed it. You often will find yourself wrong.

2. You should push your kid out of the home if you suspect him...you are not doing him any good letting him loaf, and if you suspect him then you have other problems that really mean he should go sooner rather than later..

3. You can still order pears--though not likely your cultivars--from northern nurseries like Raintree and Burnt Ridge.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

It's not too late to talk to your son. I hope you can get your trees back. I hope it wasn't him, but then how sad to have them stolen anyway. Young people feel discouraged right now when there is no work and people with experience and diplomas are taking jobs high school students used to get. I hope the nation can work this out. I am worried for young people. It's not good to have so many young people feeling down about the future. I have a friend who was having little incidents around the house with roommates both while she was gone and when at home as well. She quietly put out some discreet cameras that look like digital clocks, etc. ( spy cams sold online) That put an end to the wondering and she was able to move forward.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

Milehigh, so sorry to hear about the loss of your trees. I hope your son has a change of heart, and confesses what he's done (that was an expensive loss, I'm thinking around $150 to $225 dollars). Hopefully, he was not the one who stole your lovely, lovely trees, that would have been very mean spirited and spoiled of him, especially considering his mom is providing a roof over his head and a warm meal in his stomach. :-(

As to your trees, call the guys at Tierra Madre. They often have trees beyond bare root season. I got my rare pears from them very late in the season a couple of years ago. Also try Trees of Antiquity, http://www.treesofantiquity.com. I have a Fondante de Moulins Lille from Tierra Madre, and looking like I will have some fruit this year from it, as well as several other of my heirloom pears. Very excited about that. I know how special these incredible heirloom pear varieties are. Pears are my most favorite of all stone/pome fruits. That, and cherries. Keep us posted, I hope you can find the replacements, I know how heartsick you must be over this.

Patty S.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

I appreciate your support. I don't know for sure he did it so I don't feel I can just jump on him. He's got horrible asthma and allergies and he's had a tough time keeping his grades up. I have spent many thousands of dollars on him taking him to every kind of doctor or practitioner I can think of. We are going to National Jewish now and hopefully they can make some progress with him. (I probably will have to give up my cats) He's certainly not outwardly rebellious but he's too comfortable now and not realizing he has got to get on with his life. He really resists my prodding. It's just that there were too many coincidences that point to his doing it and it's just really nagging at me. Ugh!

Anyway, I will try to contact Tierra Madre once more. They do have one remaining Fondante de Moulins Lille but it's in a 5-gallon pot. Maybe it's still a little dormant and they can shake the dirt off and send it. My order was just under $200.00 with shipping.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

Oh, I am so sorry you are going through this :(.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

The loss of your plants is so sad! I hope you can replace them soon.

Does your son get allergy shots? I do, and it's been such an enrichment to my life. I was tested for allergies, and yep! Cats were a huge offender! Not dogs or chickens. Cats!! Along with molds, grasses and pollens.

Anyway, the shots are not drugs. They take a tiny amount of the things you are allergic to and shoot you with that to build up immunity. It takes a year+ for treatment, but well worth it!

Good luck to you! Hope your son gets better! I don't know the trees you seek, but maybe someone here in this forum can shoot you some rooted cuttings or something?

Suzi


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

  • Posted by olpea zone 6 KS (My Page) on
    Sun, Mar 24, 13 at 10:42

I'm sorry to hear about this Milehigh. Reading your post really elicited a strong emotional response in me. Empathy/anger at the situation. Everyone (even the best people) have stolen something from someone else at some time in their life, but when something is stolen from you (especially something you really value) you feel violated.

I don't think most people could understand how much a box of trees means to a serious fruit hobbyist, because they wouldn't understand the investment in time and hope (not to mention money) that went into the order.

As has been mentioned, the worst part is your son may have been the culprit. I certainly wouldn't presume to give you advice there. Relationships can be so very complicated. It's just so very disappointing that he may have done this to you.

I can't offer any encouraging news on obtaining trees this late. Of the varieties you mention, I have Baby Crawford and could send you some scionwood if that would help. I'd also offer Gold Dust scionwood if I was sure my Gold Dust tree was true to name, but it probably isn't.

Regarding Crawford peaches, I ordered and paid for an Early Crawford from Arboreum last fall and they still haven't sent the tree. I have my doubts that they are going to. I emailed them about a week ago and didn't get a response. Nothing compared to what happened to you, but still a little frustrating. I paid $38 for the tree.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

Sucks Milehigh! I can relate to an extent. I have a brother who is 23, got a GED, no college, hasent worked in 4 years and is just loafing around my Dads house. Been doing it a long time! Dads afraid of tough love cause he thinks the poor kid will just starve to death. I love the crap out of him but it sure is a hard pill to swallow. He doesnt run with the best crowd either and his "buddies" have stolen some very valuable things from my father in years past. Some times it takes longer for some people to grow up. It took me having a child to really get my act together. Havent looked back since. Everyone has a turning point in life, its just a matter of when. Now if he came to my house and stole my plants, it would be A$$holes and Elbows but hes my brother so I can do that;)


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

Sorry to hear about that milehigh. I have an extra Fondante which I could dig up if you were interested. It was an Ubileen I got last year from Tierra Madre, they were supposed to send it on quince but made a mistake and sent it on OH97. They sent me a free replacement Ubileen so I just stuck it in the ground and topworked FdML on it.

Olpea, I just got my order from Arboreum on Friday. They also did not answer my emails (or MrsG's). So, I expect your tree will show up.

Scott


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

That sux. I understand your not wanting to jump on your son as you say and I agree but the obvious question to me. Is have you ASKED him if he knows anything about the missing trees? You say you suspect him, then letting that fester without giving him a chance to either confess or clear his name is not fair to either one of you. If you have already done this,please forget that I am an idiot.


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  • Posted by olpea zone 6 KS (My Page) on
    Sun, Mar 24, 13 at 13:50

"Olpea, I just got my order from Arboreum on Friday. They also did not answer my emails (or MrsG's). So, I expect your tree will show up. "

Thanks Scott. Maybe I gave up on them too soon. I had thought they shipped all their trees by the end of Feb. or first part of March (because I didn't think they had refrigeration) and so missed my order in their shipping season.

Thanks, it may yet then arrive.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

MG,

Sorry to here about your trees. I hope these were not the ones you planned to give to your sister in IA this spring.

Tony


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

My son was recently tested for allergies and he's allergic to most everything. We will begin the shots soon. I did take him to have shots when he was in grade school and assumed that he had overcome most of his allergies, but apparently not.

I did ask him if he took the trees and he denied it. This sure is a wake-up call. It's time to see a counselor.

Oddly enough the trees that were stolen were all for me. The trees that are for my aunt were all coming from other suppliers.

Scott, I would love to have your extra Fondante de Moulins Lille. How odd that the only regret I had was that I didn't have room for Ubileen! I'll send a PM.

The peach trees were replacements for ones I had but wasn't happy with, so I might be able to graft onto them but from what I hear peaches are one of the harder to graft. I have open spots for the pears and they take so long to come into bearing that I was just heartbroken to have to wait another year.

I appreciate all your advice. I know it is time for tough love but oh my it's hard. He has been using my empathic nature to manipulate me, and he's using his health issues as an excuse. So many people overcome so many other serious health problems that it makes his pale in comparison. This just put the urgency of the situation in full focus for me. It's hard for him to make friends and my maternal nature just wants to protect him.

I just got done reading the book Columbine and boy is that scary. I lived just a few miles from Columbine and my church was in the same strip-mall that the Black Jack Pizza was that Eric and Dylan worked at. We got pizza from them nearly every week. The bowling alley was just down the street from my house. Oddly enough, it sounds like the parents of Dylan and Eric did quite a lot to help their boys. They certainly were not in denial that there were problems and they had made concerted efforts to straighten things out.

I know that my son's acting out is just a symptom of something really deep inside and it needs to be addressed. Thank you all for your encouragement. I really needed it.


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Milehigh! You can do it! If you can manage the detail of an orchard this will be something you can grasp and go with. Your idea of Counseling is right on target. Good Luck, Mrs. G PS wish I had a tree to send to you!


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I am so touched that you folks are offering trees to milehigh :). I don't have anything relevant to send, but I think it's an awfully sweet gesture.

All I can send are e-hugs, milehigh, and trust that you will work things out with your son.


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  • Posted by skyjs z8 OR, USA (My Page) on
    Mon, Mar 25, 13 at 2:31

Sorry about your trees mile high,
We also worry about our kids. I think all parents do. We just try to listen and be open to new ideas about improving their lives, and let them have input on consequences. We had some plants stolen that were in the ground a few years back. Bummer.
I hope it works out well for you.
John S
PDX OR


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

I don't mean this to be snarky, or offputting, so please don't take it that way: You took something away that he likes, and he (may have) responded by doing the same to you. This is pretty natural human behavior, and its one of the reasons that incentives work much better than punishment.

Counseling is probably a good idea, for both of you.

You said his friends have stolen things before, and he said he didn't do it. Are you sure he did?


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"incentives work much better than punishment"

I would argue the opposite, it is the lack of consistent, reliable punishment that has produced many problematic behaviors in children today.

More generally, I don't think you, me, or anyone else here can speak to what mhg is experiencing without a lot more information.

Scott


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

What if you put up fliers offering a reward for the return of the trees? You might get them back and then at least you could plant them this year. Money's a good incentive sometimes for an anonymous return.


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Don't underestimate the effect of allergies on behavior. We had a difficult son who turned out to have food allergies. Once we got him on a special diet and treatments, he was a different person. Turned out to be a wonderful, sensitive young man with a happy marriage. Then he was senselessly murdered at the shop he managed!
I wish you the best with the counseling. I would highly recommend going with a Christian counsellor.
I know the trees are a big loss to you, but in the long run, one year of growth won't seem that important. Northwoodswis


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

The situation you are in is not an ideal one but it is all too common. I'm sure there are several on this forum that are experiencing some of the same things you are with your child or will experience them. I have a teenager that has been very difficult to reach in terms of how to strive for success in life. He's not a deviant child but he doesn't take anything seriously that would better his future, primarily school. He's a smart kid but he doesn't do his work over half of the time. It makes it very difficult in today's society to not have a solid grasp on things taught in high school. We have talked to him over and over.

These are things that I have come to grips with and I think it is helpful for just about any parent or even younger person to understand. We learn in two ways: our experiences and the experiences of others. The most painless method of learning is obviously from the experiences of others through advice and hearing/reading other people's past experiences. On the other hand, learning things through our own experiences can often be painful. If a child doesn't listen to advice of people who are older and have wisdom, he only has one other way to learn and unfortunately that means there will likely be some pain involved. And if a child doesn't learn how to be an adult, he will never become an adult.

I am sorry to hear of your fruit tree theft and I hope your trees re-appear no matter who stole them.

This post was edited by thapranksta on Tue, Mar 26, 13 at 14:21


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

Check for your trees on Ebay or Craig's list. Unscrupulous people make a business out of selling stolen goods.

Suzi


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

Milehigh, I too thought peaches were tough to graft but last year I waited until they were fully leafed out and put up 4 or 5 grafts and each one took. I used parafilm and electric tape and the simplest of grafts- the splice. I think the wood drys out quickly so trees need to be in most vigorous growth to assure scion heals before drying out. I got good growth on the grafts as well. I'll wait one more year for fruit so I can establish decent branches.

If your son has major allergies it is a huge challenge. I have a nephew who struggled with non-specific allergies but discovered after a great deal of parental effort that he was primarily allergic to gluten. Once that was pinpointed his life did a complete 360.

Another underdiagnosed ailment is thyroid- either hyper or hypo.

Hope you don't mind me pointing these things out- I know it can be a pain when people mindlessly try to diagnose other peoples physical problems- we probably do it partially for selfish reasons in that it makes us feel like we have power of life's random bullets and the random bullets you've had to endure could happen to any of us. Good luck.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

You guys have all been so supportive! I appreciate knowing that I'm not alone. I have six sons; the two oldest have gotten engineering degrees and one of them is getting his doctorate. Then there's my youngest son who just dropped out of high school. He sounds quite a lot like thapranksta's son. He's a savant when it comes to mechanical things and all his life I have told him he could be a mechanic or a mechanical engineer. But he's happier than he's ever been going to work with my dad at his mechanic's shop. This has been more positive for him than ditching school and hanging around the wrong crowd.

Every child is different and what disciplines one child will make another more defiant.

But on to happier things....Scott has sent me a pear and a peach tree, both that have grafts of a different culitvar, so I am ecstatic and really glad to have this gloom lifted off of me.

Scott says he doesn't want anything but shipping for the trees so I want to "pay it forward" and offer some trees to someone else. For some reason I did not realize I already had Bramley's Seedling apple tree and I bought another. It is on G.11 rootstock. I also have a Saturn peach and PF-1 peach that I will be replacing I think they are on seedling rootstock. I will have to trim them quite a bit to ship them, but they are still dormant and now would be a good time.

Send me a PM if you are interested.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

Happy you have some closure, and I think your son rocks! He didn't do the deed, and you trusted him. That rules!!

Enjoy your new trees!

Make pies!

Suzi


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

I wish I had more experience with peach trees. If I did, I would gladly accept that PF-1 peach from you. However, it would be better served to someone else since I am still learning the ropes and I strive to thoughtfully prune and nurture my lone Redhaven peach tree.

The Bramley Seedling apparently needs two mates to bear fruit and I have room for them but I think my wife would ultimately have my head if I were to add 3 apple trees at this time. It's awesome that this forum has been able to come support you and you are attempting to return the favor.

As for my son, I can't say whether he will go to college but he WILL finish high school if we have to drag him there by the collar of his shirt. lol. Every child is indeed different and it's wonderful your son has found something productive that he is happy with and taken some responsibility. Ultimately, that is what I want as well.


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  • Posted by olpea zone 6 KS (My Page) on
    Wed, Mar 27, 13 at 12:23

Milehigh,

It doesn't surprise me you are replacing PF1. I've become more disappointed in that variety (tastewise). Originally I liked it because it was so early and disease free and tasted good enough for an extremely early peach, but I think my standards have moved up, as I've grown more varieties. I still think it's a good candidate for someone who wants to try to get peaches without sprays east of the Rockies. I'm not saying it would work, but it's probably one of the best varieties to try.

I think I have found a way to better manage the flavor on this variety. I've found the first picking is pretty good, but for some reason the quality drops sharply on subsequent pickings. I plan to stop selling anything off this variety after the first picking.

I planted 10 of these trees last spring. I wish I knew of a high quality peach that ripens in this window. I'm trying Rich May and if it's better, I'll rip out the PF1s and replace with more Rich May.

I'm becoming more disillusioned with Paul Friday's breeding program. Yeah his peaches are grower friendly, but of the three I've grown, none of them are as good tasting as the Stellar series peaches I've grown.

I grow PF Lucky 13, but Blazingstar (which ripens a few days earlier) knocks the pants off Lucky 13 in flavor. The only problem with Blazinstar is that it's very small, but I'll generally trade size for flavor (that is I'd rather have a more flavorful peach than a big peach).

A lot more Paul Friday varieties are grown vs. Stellar series, but I think that's due to marketing. Paul Friday knows how to market anything. In one article he mentioned, at his farm market he once hung up ziplock bags containing nothing but water, and sold them as "invisible fish".

Curious why you are getting rid of Saturn?


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

olpea,

You are probably correct about the PF-1 and using only the first fruits. I was amazed at how wonderful the first peach was but once the later ones ripened they did not have the same depth of flavor. It was amazing to have a full-sized, tree-ripened peach in June! I am replacing it with Harrow Diamond.

The Saturn is a wonderful peach but it is hard to get a good crop because it thins itself so drastically. It is very sweet but I think my tastebuds like a more complex, tart blend in a peach. I can see why they fetch such a high price in the stores.

So, the offer still stands: Bramley's Seedling (which is a triploid), PF-1 and Saturn.

This post was edited by milehighgirl on Thu, Mar 28, 13 at 0:54


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  • Posted by olpea zone 6 KS (My Page) on
    Wed, Mar 27, 13 at 16:18

"I am replacing it with Harrow Diamond."

I put in a Harrow Diamond this spring (from Cummins). From what I've been able to read, it ripens somewhere around -18 to -22. PF1 ripens -30. Not a big difference to most folks, but too much difference in harvest window for me to replace PF1 with Harrow Diamond.

I also put in a Saturn last year. I'd love it if thins itself drastically. I hate thinning, but I think I know what you mean. That is, it sounds like it doesn't produce very well for you. I certainly know what you mean about preferring a little more tart blend in a peach.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

MH, I also wish Saturn would thin itself, it sets peaches here like it thinks they are grapes and it is the most time consuming variety of peach to thin I know of. If it is not setting fruit for you I suspect it is just too young and weak. I am not a big fan of whites either.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

Sunnibel7,

I got your message but there was no way to reply. Please try again.
(PLEASE NOTE: The member responding to your post has chosen not to reveal his or her email address. Therefore, you cannot reply to this message via email.)


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

I'm sorry reading all this. Sorry your trees are gone. But even sorrier you have a bad relationship with your child. I truly hope this eventually works out for you.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

Gardenweb gnomes have been frolicing in my member page settings, it seems...


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

Sunnibel7,

Still no good. If you click on my profile it should show my email address. Send me an email from your email program rather than through gardenweb's form.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

Ok, now before I click on a link, is this Spam Arrester thing real?


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

Well, after a whole day of digging and then packaging trees to send to sunnibel7 I found out that the shipping would be just about $77.00. This has disheartened me but sunnibel7 has been very understanding. I'm going to try to find someone local that wants an apple and a peach. They are quite large and quite heavy and I could not justify the expense of shipping them.

We have a swap coming up in May so I may just take them then. Otherwise if someone here in Denver would like them please let me know. I would rather not pot them up.


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RE: Trees stolen- I need some commiseration

MIlehigh,
I sent you a PM over the weekend regarding a home for the trees, but I lack faith in Gardenweb's messaging so let me know if it never showed up.


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