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life seems complicated

Posted by tootswisc z4/5Wi (My Page) on
Sat, Feb 18, 06 at 16:04

Right now, it seems like almost every aspect of my life is complicated. I seem to be plugging along. I think I am doing somewhat OK. I am thinking I probably should start swimming laps or else have lot's of (good) sex. So far in life, those 2 activities have worked the best for me to stop my mind from spinning. Just wondering, what works for other people.


Follow-Up Postings:

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RE: life seems complicated

  • Posted by fishies Ottawa z4a or 5 (My Page) on
    Sat, Feb 18, 06 at 18:12

Moonstruck. Seriously. The last two weeks have been a nightmare for me - I've been way too overworked, and way too emotionally overdrawn. And Moonstruck works every time. There's just something about Olympia Dukakis that makes everything right.

Good sex could help, too, though.

You know... either/or.


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or if you're feeling really wild...

  • Posted by fishies Ottawa z4a or 5 (My Page) on
    Sat, Feb 18, 06 at 18:13

Or both!!

Oh, just hold me back: I'm a wild woman.


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RE: life seems complicated

I suppose both are out of the realm of possibilities? Say it ain't necessarily so.


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RE: life seems complicated

I could see that being possible. I will have to search my on demand for moonstruck. But I am afraid the good sex part might be more difficult because of this post. You know the spontaneity thing.

It really is a shame that Gil doesn't know how to swim.


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RE: life seems complicated

  • Posted by fishies Ottawa z4a or 5 (My Page) on
    Sun, Feb 19, 06 at 12:29

But with a name like Gil he doesn't really have to know how to swim. That is a fabulous name, indeed :)

Hope you're feeling better,
S.


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RE: life seems complicated

Hi Diane,

My life is also a little complicated right now. Actually, complicated doesn't really describe it very well. I think I would use the word "challenging" to better described it. I am also trying to find solutions to make it better, but I'm not having much success either.

I didn't mean to hijack your thread or imply that my problems are worse than your problems. I just thought that maybe the old saying "misery loves company" could described your and my relationship.

I really hope that you are able to find a solution, and if not, I hope you feel better talking about it here.

Take care,

Larry


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RE: life seems complicated

Thank you Larry. So far, I am excercising more and I bought 3 plants yesterday. But the complicating factors keep snowballing. Maybe self help books might be helpful. What sort of coping things have you tried. Misery loves company-kind of a strange thought because I am not at all comforted by knowing that you are stressed out too. Let's try a different old saying. Power to the people doesn't quite fit. Strength in numbers-that's not even a saying. As you can hear, I've had 2 cups of coffee and I am rambling. I am sure someone can help us here!. We can work it out.


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RE: life seems complicated

  • Posted by fishies Ottawa z4a or 5 (My Page) on
    Wed, Feb 22, 06 at 10:58

Hi guys,

I'm so sorry that you're both feeling ucky. Do your loved ones know how you're feeling? I've found that the best strategy for getting rid of the complication blues (barring Moonstruck, of course) is to tell people I need them. And then telling them exactly what I need from them. People who love you are often surprisingly compliant to do what they can when you need it. I've even found strangers to be really helpful. But sometimes they don't always know exactly what you need.

Of course, determining *what* you need, from yourself and others, can be yet another complication :)

Shelly


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RE: life seems complicated

Hi,

My wife knows all about it but I am afraid that she doesn't have the ability to help with the situation this time. She is definitely my partner in more ways than one and my confidant.

I have had other challenges in the past and have always gotten through them, so I'm pretty sure that I will make it through this one. In some ways I feel that all of the past challenges were there to prepare me for this.

My faith in a higher power gives me comfort. I'm not so much religious as I am spiritual. I am a Christian but am not mainstream. I guess I would call myself a liberal Christian. My fundamentalist Christian friends fear for my mortal soul, but I am quite comfortable with my spirituality.

A good psychologist always helps. I have been lucky to have good health insurance that helps pay for a psychologist. I definitely came into adulthood with "baggage". If I still had that baggage I would be having a more difficult time with this challenge. So my past work on myself is definitely helping now. At this time, my psychologist is a big help in getting me through this.

I try to find diversions. I have been playing on the computer and teaching myself a programming language that starts with a J that iVillage will not let me type out. It makes me use my brain and is something I am enjoying. I also like crossword puzzles for the same reason. I watch lots of movies. I'm not a " Moonstruck" person. My escape movie is The Lord of the Rings. It is the movie that I can get lost in. Good ultimately triumps over evil.

And, coffee always helps. lol

Larry


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RE: life seems complicated

You're a very strong person, Larry, and I wish you all the best!
I know that you're well aware of the philosophy, but I'll mention it anyway, for anyone that might grab a little help out of it--
I think the serenity prayer is one of the best thoughts put to paper, whether you think of it in terms of an appeal to a higher power, or just as a reminder to your own better judgement. Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
It's not always easy to keep from dwelling on disturbing things that you can't change, but it's always to your benefit to try to distract yourself.
I think it's great that you're teaching yourself more computer language and expanding your mind. I really admire that.

Diane, hang in there. What you accomplish is amazing. I've said it before, but you can be so hard on yourself...and you do so much for so many people! Share the burden wherever you can.


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RE: life seems complicated

Shelly, fortunately, Gil and I do draw from each others strengths and he certainly gives me lot's of support. One of my complicated feelings is about our health. Gil's knee surgery went great, but he developed a terrible sciatic pain thing-probably because of his strange limp. So he was really down and we both worried about are old bodies. I've put on a few pounds, stopped excercising and that stupid plantar fasciitis came back. I now wake up with sharp pains in both feet. But another thing that I am doing for my wellness is using one of those pill dispensers. I now take my vitamins, calcium, wellbutrin, and anti-inflamatory meds properly-I have really noticed a difference. I take meds twice a day with a huge glass of water.

Gen, thanks again for your kind words. I am actually not being overly critical with myself. I think I am doing somewhat OK and am trying to keep myself healthy-but all around me I see people who are hurting, or making bad choices or seem to be having terribly bad luck. I worry about them-but your serenity prayer is really what I needed to hear-so thank you!


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RE: life seems complicated

It's perhaps that time of year? I need to start and finish my thesis. NOW. I was accepted to the PhD program so I have to finish my master's LOL. I am going to be staff at this year's excavation in Jordan so i will be gone for a while this summer. I hate papers. I hate hurries. I generally hate research about things I care ntohing about.

And without the aforementioned good sex I cannot concentrate on ANYTHING except that I am not having it. by the time I DO have it it will have been nearly SIX MONTHS and I may die. I'm not sure. Although, on the plus side, should I expire, I will not have to worry about finishing my thesis.


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RE: life seems complicated

You poor thing. Having that thesis ahead of you is exactly how I feel most of the time. I am 54 and still can relate to that awful feeling of having of always having homework to do. Of course a thesis is quite a bit different than homework....Well, I really hope you don't die. When is your six months up?


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RE: life seems complicated

Maybe it is the time of year, alright. Two people in our little nearby town committed suicide recently. My mom has anxiety "issues". Our older DD, who always got excellent grades, is letting her work slip- putting things off until the last minute and sometimes missing important deadlines because of it. A week in sunny southern CA will do her good, I think (although it does mean missing more school.)
We are getting longer days and more sunshine now, but I think not enough of us are getting outside and taking advantage of it.


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RE: life seems complicated

  • Posted by fishies Ottawa z4a or 5 (My Page) on
    Fri, Feb 24, 06 at 11:06

I always go tanning this time of year for that very reason. One of the students in my program is from Lybia, and he was asking how Canadians cope with winter. My response was "tanning beds." And LOTS of vitamins C and B12! :)


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RE: life seems complicated

I have started a tai chi class. I am trying to find my chi although he hasn't really explained what my chi is but anyway Feb and March are the liver cleansing months-that is why we are depressed and out of sorts.


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RE: life seems complicated

  • Posted by fishies Ottawa z4a or 5 (My Page) on
    Fri, Feb 24, 06 at 19:40

Ahhh... the liver cleansing months. That would probably bring out the blues in anybody :)

I'm sorry, toots - I'm just teasing. Purging or cleansing ANYTHING is a nasty piece of business. All that ick has got to go somewhere, and it's pretty sucky when it has to go through YOU to get there.


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RE: life seems complicated

Heck yeah-- It was bad enough just cleaning the refrigerator, let alone ones liver!


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RE: life seems complicated

And here I am having a beer! I am not purging anything although I am supposed to inhale thru my belly button and exhale thru the bottom of my feet just above the arch if I don't have high blood pressure or is it if I do have high blood pressure LOL.

Actually, I do think tia chi might be helpful for me. It is a bio feed back sort of thing and I do believe in mind over matter. Today was my 3rd class. I think I feel my chi but I am not sure what it is.


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RE: life seems complicated

Chi is basically just your energy. The more you practice the more you'll feel it. It's pretty cool when you get to where you can really feel it.

Cleaning out stuff is always icky but you always feel so much better afterward.


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RE: life seems complicated

My six months is over May 16. dyyyyyiiiinnnngggg!!! LOL


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