Hey Fishies,

Commiserations to ya, I know 2nd hand how this can be, I can only wish you G_dspeed w/ it & supportively tell you keep on plugging. (My sister's a Professor & 2nd Dept head at Fordham U, so I often hear abt this stuff & how grueling it can be.)

Wishing you strength & fortitude (eat some a them bananas, you could prob. use a Potasium push). ;>)

(PG) Karen

It's all about the bananas, isn't it? In my brain or in my belly. Bananas, bananas, bananas.

I did get some good news today: a letter in the mail offering me another scholarship. Now it's not the BIG scholarship that I've been waiting on for weeks, but it's something. At least I'm guaranteed some kind of external funding for the next year. Phew!

And you know what else? I'm saying goodbye to the computer for the day, and heading out to a cafe patio to mark assignments. It's too nice out to work on my own papers. I need to be OUTSIDE!

Yay! for the sun!!! (And a big hip-hip-hooray for caffeine!)

Shelly

Hello fishies! I hear you about being inside when all you want to do is be outside. I have a ton of plants that need to either go into the ground or be repotted...and it always seems to be nice out only when I've got labwork to do! And exams, and applications... Not to mention the end of the semester only means that I have to take a prelim exam in physiology followed by 10 weeks of summer stats classes. Sigh... And I chose to go back to grad school...lol.

Kim

Well, I'm going banannas too. I think we should all have a pity party. It could be called a bananarama.

I am not a violent person, for the most part, but if I had a phaser gun, I would love to vaporize this one person who has been causing me to lose sleep. Of course, in my right mind, I guess that would be me as I would be in control of all of my feelings.

Bananarama!!! Count me in!

I mean, they weren't The Bangles or anything, but they wanted to be, and you've got to give them credit for that.

(why make pity when you can make fun?)

Is bananarama a group?... I googled.

Sara Dallin, Keren Woodward and Siobhan Fahey formed Bananarama back in 1981. The first single, "Aie A Mwana" sung entirely in Swahilli got to the dizzy heights of #92 in the UK charts. The follow-up single (a duet with the Fun Boy Three) "It Ain't What You Do" got to Number 4. Since then Bananarama have chalked up a total of 25 Top 40 UK hits, including the worldwide dance-pop smashes, "Cruel Summer", "Robert de Niro's Waiting", "Venus", "I Heard a Rumour" and "Love In the First Degree". Siobhan left the group in 1988 - coinciding with the release of the girls' "Greatest Hits" package and their entry into the Guinness Book of Records as the Most Successful All-Girl Group Ever - to form Shakespear's Sister. Her replacement, Jacquie O'Sullivan, in turn, left the group in 1991, following the "Pop Life" album. Sara and Keren, friends since they were 4, soldiered on as a duo, releasing the albums "Please Yourself" in 1993 and "Ultra Violet" (retitled "I Found Love" in Asia) in 1995. Following a one-off reunion recording (of the track "Waterloo") with Siobhan in April 1998, the twosome returned in 2001 with their eighth studio album, "Exotica" and released their ninth, "Drama" in 2005! The legend lives on!

But I might still want a pity party or something like that. I am feeling sorry for myself as I can't seem to get my head on straight.

Didn't Bananarama lip-synch?

Thanks to this thread, I now have "Venus" running through my head. AArgghhh!

Everytime I've read the title of this thread, I get that dang Gwen Stefani song stuck in my head. Grrr... LOL

What Gwen Stefani song?
I was quoting Madonna.

Bananarama...
"It's a cruel (cruel!) cruel summer,
Leaving me here on my own.
It's a cruel (cruel!) cruel summer,
Now that you're gone."

Does anyone else think the word 'cruel' looks weird? It's so middle english, you know? Maybe I really am going bananas.

That stupid bananas song. lol Holla Back Girl or whatever it's called.

You know, "This s***'s bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S." to infinity!

Pretty much anytime anyone mentions bananas, I get that song stuck in my head now. I hate that song!!! Grr!

This one guy I work with on the grad student association executive is driving me over the edge. (And in case you're thinking of suggesting this, Karen, I can't eat edges. I've tried. It doesn't work).

His latest violation of basic human decency and respect has been to publicly post a private message I'd sent him to the grad student listserve. The contents of this message? A request not to publicly post private messages sent to him by other members of the executive!! Can you believe the arrogance?!!?

I mean, not only has he betrayed my trust, but he's lost what little of my respect he ever had, AND he's continuing to annoy countless people with his idiotic antics. I mean, for the love of all that's good and holy, why on earth would he want to take a strong stand on something so infantile and unimportant? Does he really think that the entire body of graduate students cares about the pressing debate over which pub we'll go to next Friday? Or who will give next month's conference lecture? Or whether we should have our social at the Korean BBQ begin at 6:00 or at 7:30? They don't care! They've elected us to care for them! We can't have a referendum every time we want to meet for drinks! Jeez...

Okay, somebody back me up on this one. You all have surely known someone like this yahoo. 'Fess up.

Dear Shelly,

Whether you are having a social at the Korean BBQ or at a seasonal cafe, I think he's trying to curry favor with as broad a segement of the grad students as he can. This suggests to me that he's got insecurity issues, and he's had them before he began working with you.

There's a Hoover-like smell emanating from this - yep, looks like there's a whole lotta sucking up going on.

There is some good that comes from this - you know exactly where you stand with him. He's not worthy of your loyalty and trust.

And he shall rue the day that he crossed swords with Dr. Fishies. Your rapier-like good sense will serve you well, and his lack of same shall do him ill.

Oh, this guy is a piece of work. He's since publicly accused me of engaging in clandestine and Machiavellian backroom manipulations to facilitate the fun and shenanigans of me and my friends. He's also accusing other members of the executive of trying to silence the voices of the people. It's all very dramatic. I swear, it would make a fabulous episode of Degrassi Junior High.

I think you're right that he wants to make friends, and doesn't know how to go about it. But I think his need to feel important and be respected conflicts with his need to have more friends in the department. He hasn't been able to cultivate any academic respect so far, and so he's taken up the cause of democracy? Maybe?

In the end, I don't care anymore. The limits of my sympathetic nature have reached their saturation point. I've stood up for this idiot too many times. He crossed the line, and accused me of some pretty nasty things, without having a clue about what actually goes on in the lives of his fellow graduate students.

I can't believe I'm letting this yahoo get to me. It's just so aggravating!!

I do sympathise,...but I also wish I had a friend who would engage in clandestine and Machiavellian backroom manipulations to facilitate some fun and shenanigans for the gang. I think I hang with a way too cautious crowd.

Shelly,
I remember when I was accused of such shenanigans, most of them I was guilty of though, lol. I can sympathize with you, it's no fun being accused of deception. I'm sure with your whit and practiced toungue, you'll so cooly and efficiently tear him to shreds that he'll have walked a mile before he notices the blood trails. Good luck and keep us posted. :)

PS shhhh! don't tell anyone I encouraged you, after all, I have a prudish reputation to uphold.

Well, hey, the wind is blowin', sunshine calling, papers to grade, mark, read, whatever...

Take it as entertainment found alongside. If he is not currently nested in your hair, or tagged to your byline, he is well, a buzzing round your head. Or a frequentl pop on your email... Block works well for that. Or you can spend 30 minutes thinking up E-Vile Plots to engage his brain, and send him round the world, on campus espionage. Some folks, it only takes a little push to send them round the world, barking at distracting dogs of an entirely different species.

Hmmm. I will have to think more on this. I suspect that Ms. (or is it Dr.???) Shelly has not put a lot of brainpower into this question posed in response to a pest...

My dear, what is your latest status, and just WHAT shall we call you?

LOL, Jen :)

And good advice, Cena.

While the destructive and vindictive side of me would indeed like to rip him to shreds with my wit and practiced tongue, as you so eloquently put it, Mentha :), the compassionate side of Shelly is feeling guilty for having even considered it.

This guy is so fragile - he's like a big mess o' cracks. And I think that if I were to engage in payback manoeuvres, I'd be dealing him a hurt that he'd carry with him for a long, long time. I don't want to do that. Making him feel like crap won't make everything he's done go away. It'll just make me feel like crap for having made him feel like crap.

On the one hand, it'd be doing him a disservice to let him get away with his goofball antics. He's got to learn that he can't do these kinds of things. But on the other hand, it's not really my place to teach him a lesson. And if I'm honest with myself, I'm probably not qualified to teach it. Plus, it's unlikely that any lesson would be learned, anyway. It'll just result in a big old gaping mess.

I think I'm going to speak to him privately about the consequences of his actions, but I'm also going to try to be considerate of his vulnerabilities and insecurities. I hate the fact that I even have to think about all of this.

But you know what's really eerie about this whole thing? Check out my horoscope for today. I'm telling you, the stars know all about us, and it's freaking me out:

"A debate over a controversial subject, perhaps involving politics or social issues, could take place today, Shelly Carmen. At first you might find the subject matter fascinating and learn a lot from what's being said, but you'll be less comfortable when the conversation changes from a discussion into a quarrel. At that point you may want to just walk away. You're too sensitive to be comfortable there, so don't worry about being rude. Do it!"