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ladybug_guam

You know you're from So-Cal if.......

ladybug_guam
18 years ago

1. Your monthly house payments exceed your annual income.

2. You drive next to a Rolls Royce and don't notice.

3. You don't know anyone's phone number unless you check your cell phone.

4. You speak Spanish, but you're not Mexican.

5. You begin to "lie" to your friends about how close you are when you know very well that it'll take you at least an hour to get there. (Getting anywhere from point A to point B, no matter what the distance, takes about "twenty minutes".)

6. You drive to your neighborhood block party.

7. In the "winter", you can go to the beach and ski at Big Bear on the same day.

8. You eat all different ethnic food for every meal.

9. If your destination is more than 5 minutes away on foot, you're definitely driving.

10. Calling your neighbors requires knowing their area code.

11. You know what 'In N Out' is and feel bad for all the other states because they don't have any.

12. You don't stop at a STOP sign, you do a California Roll.

13. You really can never be too rich or too thin or too tan.

14. You've partied in Tijuana at least 3 times... You don't remember at least 1 of them.

15. You go to a tanning salon before going to the beach.

16. You eat pineapple on pizza.

17. Your cell phone has left a permanent impression on the side of your head.

18. You think that Venice is a beach.

19. The waitress asks if you'd like "carbs" in your meal.

20. You know who the tinsel underwear dude in Venice Beach is.

21. You classify new people you meet by their Area Code. An "818" would never date a "562" and anyone from "323" or "213" is ghetto/second class. Best area code: "714." Nobody likes anyone from the "909" because it stinks there.

22. You call 911 and they put you on hold.

23. You have a gym membership because it's mandatory.

24. The gym is packed at 3pm...on a workday.

25. You think you are better than the people who live "Over the Hill". It doesn't matter which side of the hill you are currently residing, you are just better than them, for whatever reason.

26. You know that if you drive two miles in any direction you will find a McDonald's or a Starbucks.

27. You know what "sigalert", "PCH", and "the Five" mean.

28. You can't remember . . . is pot illegal?

29. It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news station: "STORM WATCH!"

30. The Terminator is your governor.

And finally, you know you are from Southern California if....

31. You actually get these jokes.

Ana :)

PS: How's this, Bada? Still like LA?

Comments (11)

  • dottyinduncan
    18 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    Translator please!!!! Even tho we live so close and watch so much US TV, I'm stumped on lots of them.
    OK, a Canadianism: Do you know what "Turf it out" means?

  • varmint
    18 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    Removing sod from your front yard?

  • clairewags
    18 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I get this email all the time, some of it is VERY true.

    JEFF FOXWORTHY ON WIS.

    If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 38 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by, you might live in Wisconsin.

    If you're proud that your region makes he national news 96 nights each year because Park Falls is the coldest spot in the nation, you might live in Wisconsin.

    If you have ever refused to buy something because it's "too spendy", you might live in Wisconsin.

    If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might live in Wisconsin.

    If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year, you might live in Wisconsin.

    If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, you might live in Wisconsin.

    If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Wisconsin.

    If you may not have actually eaten it, but you have heard of Head Cheese, you might live in Wisconsin.

    If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Wisconsin.

    If you have either a pet or a child named "Brett", you might in Wisconsin.

    If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in Wisconsin.

    If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in Wisconsin.

    If you know how to say Oconomowoc, Waukesha, Menomonie & Manitowoc, you might live in Wisconsin.

    If you think that ketchup is a little too spicy, you might live in Wisconsin.

    If every time you see moonlight on a lake, you think of a dancing bear, and you sing gently, "From the land of sky-blue waters,....you might live in Wisconsin.

    YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE WISCONSINITE WHEN:

    1. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.
    2. "Vacation" means going up north past Hwy 8 for the weekend.
    3. You measure distance in hours.
    4. You know several people who have hit deer more than once.
    5. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again.
    6. Your whole family wears Packer Green to church on Sunday.
    7. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.
    8. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including weddings and funerals ).
    9. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
    10. You think of the major food groups as beer, fish, and venison.
    11. You carry jumper cables in your car and your wife or girlfriend knows how to use them.
    12. There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Mill's Fleet Farm at any given time.
    13. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
    14. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
    15. You refer to the Packers as "we."
    16. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.
    17. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.
    18. You have no problem pronouncing Lac Du Flambeau.
    19. You consider Minneapolis exotic.
    20. You know how to polka.
    21. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.
    22. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.
    23. Down South to you means Illinois.
    24. A brat is something you eat.
    25. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole shed.
    26. You go out to fish fry every Friday.
    27. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.
    28. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
    29. You find minus twenty degrees "a little chilly."

  • rita_h
    18 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    1. Feel guilty throwing aluminum cans or paper in the trash.
    2. Use the statement "sun break" and know what it means.
    3. Know more than 10 ways to order coffee.
    4. Know more people who own boats than air conditioners.
    5. Feel overdressed wearing a suit to a nice restaurant.
    6. Stand on a deserted corner in the rain waiting for the "Walk" signal.
    7. Consider that if it has no snow or has not recently erupted, it's not a real mountain.
    8. Can taste the difference between Starbucks, Seattle's Best Coffee, and Veneto's (and you're never more than 2 blocks from one when in town.)
    9. Know the difference between Chinook, Coho, and Sockeye salmon.
    10. Know how to pronounce Sequim, Puyallup, Issaquah, Oregon, and Willamette.
    11. Consider swimming an indoor sport, or is not a sport but a survival skill to prevent boating deaths.
    12. Can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese, Vietnamese, and Thai food.
    13. In winter, go to work in the dark and come home in the dark-while only working eight-hour days.
    14. Never go camping without waterproof matches and a poncho.
    15. Are not fazed by "Today's forecast: showers followed by rain," and "Tomorrow's forecast: rain followed by showers."
    16. You can't wait for a day with "showers and sun breaks."
    17. Have no concept of humidity without precipitation.
    18. Know that Boring is a town in Oregon and not just a state of mind.
    19. Can point to at least two volcanoes, even if you can't see through the cloud cover.
    20. Say "the mountain is out" when it's a pretty day and you can actually see it.
    21. Put on your shorts when the temperature gets above 50, but still wear your hiking boots and parka.
    22. Switch to your sandals when it gets above 60, but keep the socks on.
    23. Have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain.
    24. Think people who use umbrellas are either wimps or tourists.
    25. Knew immediately that the view out Frasier's window was fake.
    26. Buy new sunglasses every year, because you can't find the old ones after such a long time.
    27. Your idea of a traffic jam is 10 cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.
    28. "Vacation" means going to Portland for the weekend.
    29. You measure distance in hours.
    30. Know at least eight people who work for companies that manufacture computer parts, airplanes, or athletic shoes.
    31. Return from a California vacation depressed because "all the grass was dead."
    32. Take a half day every July 1 to find your sunglasses and sunscreen.
    33. Remember the date, severity, time of day, where you were, and how long you were out of power and phone service for every winter-weather event in the last five years.
    34. Have ever called your insurance agent to ask if your homeowners policy covers falling trees, flooding, or mud slides or if the number of your favorite roofing company is on your phoneÂs "speed-dial" list.
    35. Find a wallet with $500 in it, return it all to the owner and refuse a reward.
    36. Used to live somewhere else.
    37. Own more than 10 articles of clothing that have the names of microbrewries/brewpubs printed on them. Bonus for embroidery.
    38. Wave at people who drive Ford Explorer sport utility vehicles like yours. Basically, you just drive down the road waving.
    39. Think downtown is "scary" because you were panhandled there once.
    40. You are sitting at a downtown red light. The light turns green and the car in front of you does not move. You do not honk. After two more light changes, you approach the driver to ask if they need any assistance.
    41. You look in your closet to get dressed and you are stumped on whether to put on your fleece vest, fleece pants, or just go for the fleece jacket. Then youÂre stuck when you decide for the jacket and are confused on which of your six colors you should choose.
    42. You use a down comforter in the summer.
    43. Your grandparents drive 65 mph through 2 feet of water during a raging rainstorm without flinching.
    44. You see people wearing camouflage at social events.
    45. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
    46. You think of the major food groups as elk meat, deer, fish, and berries.
    47. You carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them.
    48. There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at the BiMart store at any given time.
    49. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit under a raincoat.
    50. Driving is better in the winter because almost everybody stays home.
    51. You know all the important seasons: Almost winter, Winter, Still raining, Road construction, Deer season, and Elk
    season.

  • Sue_
    18 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    It's easy to figure out if you're a Mainer. You are from Maine if . . .

    1. The words "yes" and "here" are distinguishable only by context.

  • Ginge
    18 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    *laughing * I get most of the So.-Cal. ones , guess where I moved from . :) Do they still have Jack in the Cracks there?
    Gin

  • Sue_
    18 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    We have jack in the cracks in St. Louis! You don't have them out there?

    And, man, I used to live in 909. And it did tend to smell, except when the wind was right and the LA smog got sent down to 619 instead.

    Oh, and for extra credit, there's the thing which you can order at in-n-out which isn't on the menu. That's the mark of somebody who knows San Dimas in some way other than just as a place with a circle-K whose high school football proportedly rocks.

  • bada
    18 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    ok, ok, ana, I get most of them...thank god not all of them...got a kick out of the others, too...claire, too funny, and I know nothing about wisconsin...and yours, too, rita... it can be a good thing localities still haven't lost their flavor...what with all this globalisation #$%^!

    bada

  • clairewags
    18 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    On weekend while the DH was gone, I drove and hour or so north to J & K orchids, bought some 'kids, stopped at a Big Dog/ Harley dealership (didn't buy anything there :)), stopped at Midwest Shooters Supply to poke around. The Shooter Supply is on a frontage road. On a yucky, rainy day in the middle of October, there is a little stand on the frontage road selling pumpkins and brats- aka a 'brat fry'. So I stop to get a $2 brat- much like stopping to get a slice- from a mom and some high school students. How can my day get better? Orchids, motorcycles, guns and meat served from a wooden shack by people I don't know. I love this state!

    I don't think this is nation wide... The Hunters Widow Ball. Anyone else have these- or heard of them?

  • cbrf4irider
    18 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    OK, I am from Maine, and I have to disagree with the Maine joke ... oddly I can identify more with the So-Cal list just from the one month I spent there. And I do know how to order things not on the menu at In-n-Out (proudly).

    There is a local chain kinda like In-n-Out in East Tennessee (where I went to College) called Pal's. We feel bad for those who do not have Pal's.

    Now, I don't have a nifty list of things from Maine, but as a true Maine-iac, I can say this for sure ... there are two seasons: Winter, and the 4th of July. Anyone from Massachusetts is a "M@ssh0le". And a one-size-fits-all sundress and Birkenstocks is dressed up.

    No offense, Sue ;)

  • Sue_
    18 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I lived in Orono for a while. I swear it's true, among many I lived near, at least. Both are pronounced "Ay-uh."

    But, regardless, no offense taken. My favorite Maine joke:

    There's a New Yorker walking along a river, looking for a bridge. He sees a Mainer on the other bank, and yells out, "Hey! How'd you get over there?" The Mainer calls back, "Born here."

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