Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.
Johnny Carson

The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money.
Johnny Carson

Talent alone won't make you a success. Neither will being in the right place at the right time, unless you are ready. The most important question is: 'Are your ready?'
Johnny Carson

If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.
Johnny Carson