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3r3o3b

Color me nostalgia

rob333 (zone 7b)
11 years ago

Today is the last time he'll change from one level of school to another until University. The first time he'll ride the city bus to and from school instead of just home to me. It's hitting me hard! How will I ever survive him moving away?! It was just like walking away from him his first day of kindergarten. Even though I'm enjoying all the moments, to the exclusion of a tidy home!, it's going way too fast.

Comments (16)

  • lilosophie
    11 years ago

    It's a while yet until the "empty nest", but they have to fly, hard to accept some ways, but also a joy to see them soar! You are doing good, Rob!

  • lindac
    11 years ago

    Because that's your "job"....your job is to raise him to be independant to fly high and not to be living with you afraid to enter relationships with others at age 28.
    Wish him God-speed, blow him a kiss and never EVER let him know you are sad to see him go!

    Everything about raising children, from expelling them from your womb to teaching them how to walk and not be carried, aims toward independence. This is just one more step. Be glad he can go on a bus and be at school all day.
    Linda C

  • rob333 (zone 7b)
    Original Author
    11 years ago

    Isn't it so conflicting? It is what I do, but when it's done, I'm left thinking "What have I done?!" He's a great kid (despite me-ha!), he's gonna go far. But I'm not ready for it. It just feels like he'll be gone forever. I know he won't, but it sure feels like it.

    (grin!)

  • mawheel
    11 years ago

    Robin, having only one child makes the moment even more bittersweet, I imagine. But as Linda said, be happy he can do these things. Who knows, if the current economic situation continues, he may well end up back at home with you in 20 years!

  • rob333 (zone 7b)
    Original Author
    11 years ago

    Augh! He'll never leave? That may be worse.

    teehee

  • gabriell_gw
    11 years ago

    When I first began reading this forum I remember you wrote a lot about him and he was young. Is he entering high school? Hard to believe. Post a current picture.Didn't you refer to him as LF?

  • gabriell_gw
    11 years ago

    When I first began reading this forum I remember you wrote a lot about him and he was young. Is he entering high school? Hard to believe. Post a current picture.Didn't you refer to him as LF?

  • anneliese_32
    11 years ago

    Having one kid makes it harder but you are doing a good job. Hard to belief that he already going to high school. This is the time when they have to learn to fly.

  • rob333 (zone 7b)
    Original Author
    11 years ago

    Gabriell,

    He'll always be my little fellar, even when he towers over me ;) He doesn't mind my pet name. He knows he's not a baby just cause he's "my baby". I'll have to find a current picture. Thanks for asking!

  • meldy_nva
    11 years ago

    It really IS hard! And don't forget the milestones to come (every one guaranteed to gnaw your nerves): afterschool sports/clubs; girls; learning just how different HS is from elementary; girls; a teacher who 'hates' him; girls; dating; girls; learning to drive~ your car, of course; girls; a sports injury; girls; afterschool job/s; girls; figuring out how to juggle the time & effort all the preceding require; college and tuition applications; girls; graduation ceremonies (I hear some schools have them after 8th grade as well) ~~ and then suddenly one day y'all be packing up for college ~~ and you will cry, and you will smile, and you will be so proud of him that words won't come.

    Me, I'm already proud of both of you.
    hugs,
    meldy

  • Janis_G
    11 years ago

    Robin, just how old is LF?
    He can't be in high school.
    Surely not.

    Next thing I know, you'll be telling me
    he is driving your car!!!

  • Mrobbins
    11 years ago

    Meldy, I laughed aloud at my desk (where I'm supposed to be working) when I read your answer!

    Gosh, I remember -- from way back in the day -- when LF was toddling around. He's grown up fast for me too! But of course grownup time moves at a different pace from kid time. Do you remember being a kid, and feeling yourself growing? I'm a pretty sensitive critter and I only felt it a few times. It's just the design of things: if they could feel how fast they are growing up, kids would all go crazy.

    I'm an only child and I still live within a subway's ride of my dad. But I've had my own apartment, and life, for over twenty years. One of the things my dad said that made me feel the proudest, a few years after I was working and living on my own, was: "You're self-sufficient now." I knew he trusted me to take care of myself; and so I started to trust that about myself too. One of the pictures of my dad I like the best is when I invited him to one of my yearly borscht parties, and he's sitting on my couch with a plate full of amazing food I cooked, with a gleeful look on his face as he's about to tuck in. I could caption the picture: "Look what my kid made! Aren't I lucky!!"

    You have many moments ahead of you, Rob, to enjoy the adult your LF becomes. He will bring you people he's met, experiences to share, crises to stem; he will make you proud with all of his discoveries and successes. What a richness you possess through just the fact of your son's existence!

  • rob333 (zone 7b)
    Original Author
    11 years ago

    I am just now seeing this again. No dear Jan, he's not in high school. But he is in a high school. Crazy, huh?! His 7/8th grade are housed in the high school that he'll attend when he finishes those grades. All the kids in one building. What is cool is, these kids are so kind. The big ones make extra certain to take care of the little ones. That was the part that had me worried. He had to teach some of the older students where and how to catch our city bus, so it is reciprocated. (big smile!)

    Y'all are right of course. There are many many events and notches along the timeline, Meldy. It's just of those moments where it's time to step back and look forward. He added riding the bus to school and now, instead of to my office, he goes home. He's 99% responsible for his own transport. I still have to get him up and out, but he does the rest. I think that was the hardest part for me. He's getting so much closer to self-sufficient. Riding the bus whenever, however he wants, lets him stay after school and be in the fencing club, for instance. He's too little to do that isn't he?! Nope, he's not. This just makes me realize it. I can't imagine the day he'll do the things you do so beautifully Mary! I know your daddy is pleased as punch. I would be.

    I already am proud to know this boy (can't imagine when he reaches your level!), but it sure aint nuthin' I done did. He's just one of those wise souls who come out knowing how to navigate and what to say. Y'all know I don't know the right thing to say! HA! We went to funeral yesterday. He told me he wanted to go sit down, and my only reply to him was, right after he spoke to B. He walked right over to her, touched her arm, and said, "So how are you doing..." and really wanted to know. He teaches me so much more than I teach him. Guess "someone" knew I needed help in that area! I'll take it.

  • mawheel
    11 years ago

    Two of my great-grandsons have started school: one last week into kindergarten, the other, just today, to Pre-kindergarten. (His birthday is a little beyond the cut-off date to start "regular" kindergarten, this Fall.)

    I'm sure this time is bitter-sweet for their Moms; it was just a few years ago that their sweet little boys were born! And it's that way for us, b/c we remember when the Moms were born!

  • west_gardener
    11 years ago

    When I came to this country at age 15-1/2, I went to what was called Americanization School in DC, all the students were from foreign countries. Our school were housed in a wing of a regular high school. We interacted with the other students before/after and during lunch. And once we finished the special school, we could the enter the regular high school and we already knew a bunch of our classmates.
    I moved away to another school but I felt very comfortable in my new school.

  • rob333 (zone 7b)
    Original Author
    11 years ago

    Yes, that's the idea. That they sort of mentor each other. Seems to be working. He's just so little. Kids who are years younger than he are taller. He's gonna shoot up, but it hasn't happened yet. Since he's a boy, that's a real concern, being pummeled; that's male hierarchy for you (for girls it's included/excluded). ugh. It's ok! I'll worry about that "tomorrow".

    ;)

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