"Once again we find ourselves enmeshed in the Holiday Season, that very special time of year when we join with our loved ones in sharing centuries-old traditions such as trying to find a parking space at the mall. We traditionally do this in my family by driving around the parking lot until we see a shopper emerge from the mall, then we follow her, in very much the same spirit as the Three Wise Men, who 2,000 years ago followed a star, week after week, until it led them to a parking space." - Dave Barry, humor columnist

"There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child." - Erma Bombeck, humorist

"Christmas is the season when you buy this year's gifts with next year's money." - Anonymous