Major Fi,

That is the best news I have heard for a long time! We could easily combine your "Advanced Techniques and Strategies of Paintball...how to run like hell" with my brother's "How to Stalk WITHOUT MERCY The Easy Target." Certainly this would require a prolonged lab where we could all practice the techniques we have discussed with the other participants at the A MD seminar.

Practice does make perfect.

This next XY seminar will be OTT with the combined efforts of Mr. MSM Mogul and yourself, Major Fi. Working out the many details will take time, XY time, that is.

Respectfully,

SA 'appy

_______________________________________________________

Sorry Bonz to have interrupted your thread.
Mike

It's been fun reading the posts, you guys are too funny!

Major Fi, thank you for your invitation to the MD's MD in MD sometime in MD.
The Royal Canadian Goosi will be most 'appy to send 'appy a representative or two to discuss the techniques of "Carpet Bombing".
The RCG in fact are renown for bombing targets everywhere, carpets, decks, lawns, parking lots,etc,etc, etc, we just don't care, our motto being,

When in the air,don't look below.
Just open the shoot and let it go!

Looking forward to covering this event.
Mr Mogal,
MoM & MSP. RCG Adj.

I knew signing up as a volunteer "easy target" sounded too good to be true (I thought "tar-jay" was French for "destiny"). All I wanted was a free vacation to MD.

I'll be sure to get plenty of pics as I'm running.

Brenda

Bonz,

Thank you for being a good sport! I believe that you are eligible for some of the CE credit hours by reading this most vital of XY information. :-)

Mike
_____________________________________________________

Brenda,

I am sorry to say but you would be disqualified as the volunteer "easy target" as you are a member of the gentler sex. One of the stringent rules by which a real MD (Manly Man ) lives is to respect the XX folks to the fullest extent. To hunt you down with paintballs is NOT how a true XY would or should behave. We could never risk injuring you in any way!

Please do feel free to join us and be part of the crowd as we practice our training maneuvers. I feel certain that you would be able to do some target practice too but as I am sure you are already aware, whining WILL follow any direct hit. It is the XY way. :-)

Mike
_________________________________________________________

Mr. Mogal, MoM & MSP. RCG Adj.:

The A MD Committee is delighted and honored that the Royal Canadian Goosi will be participating in the seminar. Bombing techniques discussions are always interesting and much desired by the XYs.

If the RCG representatives will be giving demonstrations of their tactical expertise we will need to provide umbrellas for the crowds and seminar registrants.

We will need to update the eZine advert. because of these stunning and exciting developments concerning the A MD seminar. Thank you all for your support and interest in the XY seminars.

SA'appy

Press Release

ALL members of this forum are hereby invited to the red carpet premier openning for the sequel to the 80's blockbuster hit TOP GOOSE.

Central Command Studios also asks fellow members to show their humor and creativity by coming up with some interesting suggestions for the credit score.... anything from actors' names to stunt people to key Grip (whatever that is). The movie will be completed with these suggestions.

Here is a link that might be useful: A Preview of Top Goose-ii

LMAO!!! I can't even think now, but I SO look forward to the suggestions! As always, brilliant piece of work, Semper Fi Goosi!

Brenda

Major Fi-Preminger.

I was going to give you the ultimate of praise but for fear of yet another demotion I shall refrain from offending one OUTSTANDING ! XY for his creativity! Best movie I have ever seen. How do you do that? :-)

BRAVO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A Key Grip is like the main 'go-'fer' of the set. He or she is responsible to getting the details of a scene right as well as obtaining items that the cast or crew may desire. A very important person.

Speaking of carpeting, I am now going to lay carpet in two rooms before 'hickadee returns.

SA'appy

Central Command-MoM & MSP- RCG HQ,etc,etc,etc.?
Major Fi? Goosi Goosi Gander,RCG Adj.?

Mmmmmmike will be going to Mississippi later this month. PLEEEZE don't track him on radar and bomb him! There would be collateral damage to feathered innocents that are being returned home.

His trip home??? ..... Well that is a different matter although I would prefer that he remain unharmed and Goosi Poopi free. :-)

Chick in 3 D

(Doing my best impression of the Russian dude from the current season of 24):

Vee need da exakt root of Meester Nappee's motorcade. If ewe dont komply weeth hour demands, vee will use de bumbs against oder {{gwi:165336}}.

Great Movie Semp! and to think I almost missed it.
You might want to think about approaching the Canadian air force with that video, they could use it as one of there recruitment videos, or even a training video. LOL
I will be showing it to my kids. My boys, grade 3 and 5, will be starting a Flash course this Friday at their school, humor seems to be the best motivator for creating stuff.
Well done.

LOL!! @ Meester Fi's accent

Very clever camera angling on that image, too! From that distance, you can hardly see the "L" tattoos on their fore'eads. :D

Brenda

Comrade Semper. ((You went Rooski on us?!?!?))

A Nappy® motorcade? Ya gotta be kidding!

How about his lone black Range Rover with license plate: Nappy 1 :-)

PLEEZE tell the people in your photograph to NOT open their mouths as they look up! Looking up is dangerous enough but to have the open mouth is ~~~REALLY~~~ asking for trouble! We are all aware how accurate those Goosi can be with their bombing runs, dontchaknow?

If I were to post Mike's route he would get RC Goosed fer sure!

Chick-a-Nappy®-Protector x13

Mucky_H2O+, they are teaching Macromedia Flash to pre-schoolers??? WOW! That is amazing AND great. I wonder if they do this in some of the school systems south of your border? I am certain that at least locally they don't have any such programs here since GA is usually at or near the bottom in most educational categories.

BTW, if you want to show it to the boyz, let me know if I should alter the last scene to something more suitable for them. It won't be a big deal to change it around a little.
______________________________________________________________

License tag = "Nappy Won"

Got eet!

-Duble Spy 0013

"...they are teaching Macromedia Flash to pre-schoolers???

Slapping self in the forehead! I guess I really must have had been more tired than I thought yesterday because I read your reply as "My boys, AGE 3 and 5.....". Of course, I had seen those handsome devilz a few times on your pics/videos and should have known better. Nonetheless, I still think it is OUTSTANDING that they teach this stuff to elementary school kids.

_____________________________________________________________

Mz. CleeeOh, I uzed my kontakts too werify yor informashion. Ewe must take mi four a fuul????? For a bottel of spiked mapel sirup, the klerc at de DMV offeece tole me that the aktual tag on de Briteesh maid SUV is "NappydGR8". If ewe tink dat dis iz all a beeg jok, eye must ashure ewe eet's not. Unlike de Royal Canadian Goosi vich onlee go after unstabel, vacky targets, de Russian Goozi r much mor hard boyled and roothless. It iz unfortoonate that "L" tattwoed sitizens had to get goozed four ewe to realeyes dat de Goozi meen bizness.

That's right Semp, they are in elementary school. LOL

It's actually not part of the regular school curriculum, but part of an enrichment class for a few of the kids are
doing well in school. The first part of the year they were learning how to use a program call SketchUp. A powerful 3D designing and modeling program that creates CAD like models, but is so simple and quick to use that, well, a child could use it. My kids have created some pretty elaborate castles and houses with it, complete with ponds and waterfalls. I have found it useful for a couple of projects myself. The tutorial videos for the program (also done in Flash) are very instructive and great to watch just to see what the program can can do.
I wish they had had this sort of stuff around when I was a kid, maybe I wouldn't have got myself into so
much trouble all the time. :(

Oh and don't worry about making your Top Goose II movie more suitable, there is nothing too bad in there. Goose was married to Mrs. Goose, right? ;)

From: SPECial Agent 13 'appy
To: Central Command / MoM's etc. RCG / Fi_Spy
RE: Infiltration Alert !

Sirs and Ganders:

There is an infiltrator among us. The person purporting to be Semper_Fi is an imposter as easily seen from the posts dated on and after Wed, Mar 1, 06 at 22:06.

Having gone through rigorous underground underground training I am flew-ant in Porch-ewe-geese, Italiano, Hillbilly Inglish, Spain-ish and have contacts who know their Rooski speak.

The first obvious blunder:
If ewe tink dat dis iz all a beeg jok, ...

- The word is beek. BEEK! not beeg. Perhaps it could be explained away as a typographical error. Perhaps not.

Next:
The DMV gave the tag as "NappydGR8"? Me thinks not boys and girls and ganders.

-Obviously this so called Semper Spy has the WRONG decoder ring! Maybe from the VOD, Mr. Spy Fi?!?!

-The Semimposter ended a post admitting to being -Duble Spy 0013

-The final fatal flaws were the videos. Although VERY WELL produced they fail to have the logo for Pondstalkers Productions©.

These glaring errors cannot be so simply explained away. We need to expose this streaking imposter and find what he has done with our Semper_Fi.

Respectfully,

SA'appy

-------------------------------------------------------

I put it to you Mr. Semper_Spy that you, Sir, are a frog, errrrrr fraud. A Frog Fraud!

Only the true Teufel Hunden would know the answer to the following question.

Who was the primary author of award winning series The Who Diaries ?

Your defunct decoder ring will be of no use to you on this one. Take your time.

Respectfully suspicious,

SA'appy

Muckman, I wish I had known about SketchUp when I was designing the bed for my friend's son. I wanted to mimick {{gwi:165337}} but in a loft bed format so there would be a play area below the bed. Since I was building the bed without any actual woodworking plans, I really wanted to do a 3D design to make construction easier. I tried to use AutoCad that my better half uses for her 2D architectural drawings for work but this software just has an incredibly tough learning curve and by the time I would have mastered the software, the 3 year old would have outgrown the train bed. So I had to settle for a {{gwi:165338}} that I'm more familiar with.

I just watched the training video and the software will definitely come handy for my next project. Thanks.

___________________________________________

"Who was the primary author of award winning series The Who Diaries ?"

Hmmmm.... Eye guezz de duble spie haz maid a BEEK meestake tinking I Kan git sumthing by Komarade Zappy's wachful I's. Eye wil maik a vild azz guezz and sey dat eet waz zum yoowhoo.... Karl Marx and de Who Manifesto???

Semper_Spy,

You have done your research well. Karl Marx is the correct answer and you have won a beautiful lounge suite!

AUDIENCE APPLAUSE

Major_Spy do you want to continue and answer the next question or go for what is in the box? Remember that you risk losing your lounge suite if you answer incorrectly.

GO FOR THE BOX! GO FOR THE BOX!

You are a brave man. No sign of being a gGit. He's risking it all.

AUDIENCE APPLAUSE

Major_Spy please identify the following awesome XY household object.

{{gwi:165349}}

Suspiciously respectful,

SA'appy

Sir Nappy,

You sir, saved the day. As you might have suspected, I was kidnapped by a group of radical extremist who wanted to find out more information about the UU13 Organization. At first, I did a mighty fine job of playing dumb, as it comes very naturally to me. But they eventually caught on and took some rather drastic measures. They threatened to take away the TV remote control... but even then, I only told them the basics:

NAME: Fi, Semper
Rank: Private Second Class
CEREAL: Kellog's Corn Flakes
#: 13

Rest assured that even when they threatened to hurt {{gwi:165339}}, I did not reveal the route of {{gwi:165340}}.

Your bluff about Karl Marx being the correct answer really threw these thugs for a loop. I now know that they were the same people who had hacked into your 'puter and typed that nonesensical kudos remark which originates from another Communist entity. Not knowing the answer to your second authentication question, they used frame recognition software to identify it as "Specialized Stumpjumper FSR". I overheard the thugs saying: "Dat iz won baaad ride doods".

Carry on.

Major Semper,

So good to have you back after your most harrowing experience. My God man, to be threatened with the removal of your remote control is against the Geneva Convention!

I will not question your brave decision to withhold information even in the face of extreme duress, the unspeakable threat of harming the BIKE just for the sake of keeping my motorcade under under wraps. I trust the bike IS UNHARMED?

My training was specifically XY. Do what you will but don't harm the bike! You no doubt had a different training and were able to recognize a bluff. I fear I would not be so sure of myself in a similar situation.

We here, all of us in the UU13, are well versed in the identification of infiltrators as was discussed in our last memo. A bit of a shame that Semper_Spy did not answer the second question. I think the jury would have allowed the answer of "Dat iz won baaad ride doods." It certainly is a correct response! He could have not only won the beautiful lounge suite but also a dog named Lucky. I believe you were briefed about this loveliest of pooches earlier.

I noticed that you gave your information as Rank: Private Second Class. Surely this was a ruse and you have not been demoted. Not after showing such extraordinary bravery!

I also noticed you referred to me as Sir Nappy once again. Has my demotion been revoked and my less than deserved rank of Sir® been restored?

The RCG have very good GPS capabilities! I had no idea they could photograph the target. They spotted my vehicle over the weekend and mercifully refrained from a practice bombing run. Mucho Appreciated-o RCG!

Respectfully pleased to have you back,

New Uncle SA'appy :-)

"Has my demotion been revoked and my less than deserved rank of Sir® been restored? "

Affirmative. Central Command launched a full investigation on this matter and came to the conclusion that the hackers were trying to frame you for that ridiculous kudos statement often used in denser regions. This clearly did not violate our rigid merit system, meriting a meritless demerit.

Are you certain that Lucky is able to fulfill his duty to guard against these whackos? He's such a cute impressionable little guy that I fear he cannot cut the mustard? Perhaps he can prove me wrong.

From: SPECial Agent 13 Nappy ®
To: Major Fi / Central Command
RE: URGENT

Sir:

I fear that our most valued Mr. Mogal, MoM & MSP. RCG Adj. has now been abducted! There has been no sign of him of late and this worrisome observation corresponds with the time sequence of your own kidnapping.

We here at Camp Nappy® have already set out search teams including Central Command's Lucky and our own Blinky.

{{gwi:165351}}
Copyrights Protected. C3D Enterprises.

I shall keep Central Command apprised of any developments in the location of Mr. Mogal, MoM & MSP. RCG Adj.

Respectfully respectful,

SA Nappy®

We interrupt our regular programming to wish a VERY, VERY, VERY happy birthday to one of the forum faves:

Have a GREAT day BONZ!

You're the best. Thanks for being such a good sport to put up with my silliness in this thread.

ps: I still working with Ms. CleOH to obtain the winning lottery numbers so I get you those big/cool toys as promised, until then though...
{{gwi:165354}}

:-)

HAPPY B'Day BONZIE!!!
Here's wishing you a great new toy!

:) Mary

I hope seeing that whatzit (what the...??!!) doesn't scare off, Bonz! LOL

Happy b-day!!!

Brenda

The Happiest of B. Days BonZ!

{{gwi:165358}}

C3D :-)

Hi Brenda.

That photograph is of Blinky, a cyclops kitten born without a nose and likely other congenital abnormalities. He (yes he's a boy) was the first delivered of a litter of 4 other normal kittens born to a stray abandoned Mama cat. Within 30 seconds or less the Mama cat bit him in the belly killing him quickly.

No doubt she knew somehow he could not survive. The other kittens thrived and she was a very good Mom to them! A few days after the last of her remaining kittens were adopted to loving homes, Mama cat experienced difficulty breathing. In spite of our best efforts she did not survive.

I did an autopsy on her and found that her heart was greatly thickened. VERY little blood was able to circulate through her horribly thickened heart chambers ... maybe only 1/4 or less of the normal volume. I took her home and buried her.

It seems as though she lived long enough to ensure her little family was able to care for themselves and had new homes before she allowed herself to even show she had a problem. :-(

Blinky is in a bottle of Formalin, a preservative. He was taken out for a photo shoot, hence his pose for the picture.
The chance of ever seeing a cyclops of any species is extremely rare and this poor kitten was born at our hospital.

His story and the story of his Mom is sad. His brothers and sister are doing very well. Of course we had asked only the nicest people who came to the hospital to adopt one of the kittens.

Once the story about him is understood he's not such a bad sort.

Chick a DDD

Semper, I'll put up with your silliness anytime....I love to laugh!!!

Thank you all for the birthday wishes. It was the best birthday.. I got the night off from work and again tomorrow.

And keep up the funny posts, this thread is a hoot!

Just broke away from my abductors to wish you well on your birthday Bonz.
MoM & MSP RCG, Adj,

OMG, what a sad story, C3D! Blinky is/was amazing. I have to admit, I didn't recognize that as an eye. I thought it was his little nose, due to the discoloration. Thank you for sharing that story!

Brenda

Mr. Mogal, MoM & MSP. RCG Adj. etc., etc.,etc.

Blinky was keeping his eye open to locate you. I heard that Central Command's top dog Lucky became uncharacteristically anxious due to all the commotion about your abduction. He launched himself onto the desk and he ate that cancerous spleen that had been laying about as a paper weight. He may look like he's a cute impressionable little guy but he is one mean sucker of a pooch!

That was a fantastic paper weight too. 113% guarantee that no one would touch the papers beneath it; 113% guarantee no one even came near the desk.

We had the coordinates of your location verified just as you were escaping from The Dark Side abductors. Very clever the way you were able to give them the slip by covering yourself in Canada's finest Maple Syrup and take flight.

I suspect it is party time at the RCG Squadron hanger.

Perhaps you could incorporate any non classified information about the abduction and your escape into your A MD briefings?

Good to have you back Mr. Mogul!

Respectfully,

SA Nappy®

Here's an even COOLER toy for Mr. (or Ms.) Macho who REALLY DOES have "everything" and still needs just a little bit more...

Remember "Operation Desert Storm" and how it launched "The Hummer" after "Arnold" paid GM for his own, custom-made Humvee at a cost of something like $500,000 (it was the first one NOT made exclusively FOR the military and essentially LAUNCHED the "Hummer" line).

Well I just wonder how long it'll take for the toy linked below to follow the same course...

:)

Here is a link that might be useful: A Step UP!

I was going to post a video of my Stumpjumping Stunts but I decided that this forum may not be ready for the patented Sweater Boy eats dirt moves.... so instead, here's a video of someone else's amazing stunts with his cool toy.

What amazing balance....

Come on Semper, post it, I told you I love to laugh :)

Sorry babe, but there a LONGGGGGGG list of people ahead of you who are dying to see this video! LOL!

Major Fi, Sir,

Amazing Stumpjumper videos are a vital addition to the A MD Seminars. I have no personal Stumpjumper action videos although there may be some clips of post-'Jumper stunts that had gone not quite as planned titled Nappy® The Aftermath.

C3D has agreed to pick up the briefcase filled with large unmarked bills dropped off at Century Park, next to the swing set and under the slide, in exchange for keeping those video clips in a safe undisclosed area. :-)

There are copies of the Foam out the Nose video. Just ask my brothers. Copies will be included in the Seminar packets. If time allows we could make copies of your SSS (Semper's Stumpjumper Stunts ) also.

Respectfully obviously oblivious,

'y

Bonz & Sir Nappy,

(Un)fortunately the SSS video has no entertainment value. If it did, I would most definitely post them since I scored a 9 in the Birth Order thread.

Perhaps what's even more fortunate is that even with my 1 remaining functional brain cell, I am still a little better off than this guy and a LOT better off than this crash test dummy.

I saw this sweepstakes entry, and I thought of you, Fig eye. Especially when I saw that they could build you a flowing kayak pool or a mini mountain bike trail. :D

Cool toys!

Brenda

Here is a link that might be useful: Ultimate Backyard Adventure

Heyyyyy..... Cool toys indeed. Sign me up Scotty!

On Sun. March 5th I wrote:

"Muckman, I wish I had known about SketchUp when I was designing the bed for my friend's son. I wanted to mimick this bed but in a loft bed format so there would be a play area below the bed. Since I was building the bed without any actual woodworking plans, I really wanted to do a 3D design to make construction easier. "

I finally finished building and installing {{gwi:165343}} a couple of weekends ago. Wish his room offered more space to make the front part of the engine look better.... but nonetheless the little man thinks it's a cool toy, so I guess that's all that matters.

Great job! The litle guy is going to enjoy that for a long time and the memories will be for a lifetime. When my kids were little my ex built a bunk bed tree house for them. They not only looked forward to bed time but had many stories and plays acted out in that tree house. And now many years later they still talk about that tree house bed!

Outstanding! :)
You have done a terrific job there Semp, I bet that took a few man hours to complete.
It looks like I'm seeing some of those string lights in the cab area and around the cab windows, if so you've given me an idea. My boys have some small florescent reading lights at the head of their bed I have been meaning to replace. maybe string lights would be cooler.
Is that string lights I'm seeing there? And are they bright enough to read by?

This is my choo choo bed. There are many like it, but this one is mine.
My choo choo bed is my best friend. It is my life.
I must master it as I must master my life.
My choo choo bed, without me, is useless. Without my choo choo bed, I am useless...

Thus, I will learn it as a brother. I will learn its weaknesses, its strengths, its parts, its accessories, its lights, and its cow catcher.
I will ever guard it against the ravages of weather and damage.
I will keep my choo choo bed clean and ready, even as I am clean and ready.
We will become part of each other. We will . . . .

Mike

Too cool! Semper you are a man of many talents! And obviously a very giving person to do that for a friend. Don't you love the look on their faces when they see it?

Wow! I love the little fort thing in the bottom! I used to have to tuck blankies into the top bunk of my & my brother's bunkbed to make a fort. :D I love the lights, too!

Great job, Hammer dude!

Brenda

Semper, that's one impressive choo-choo. Good to see you back.

Sis Sharon

Thanks boys & girls.

Mucky_H2O+, yeah... those are rope lights and I really like the look it gives. There are rope lights in the play area as well which gives a really nice soft glow. As my buddy and I were installing these lights, I jokingly asked him why a 3 year old needed "mood lighting"?!?! Then as we were wrapping up, the little guy shows up after taking a bath in a robe.... Hugh Hefner style. It was hillarious.

I don't think the conventional rope lighting puts out enough lumens for reading. You certainly don't want to ruin their eyes at such a young age. They now have LED rope lights which are MUCH brighter and may be just the ticket for you.

Nappy, you Sir ain't right. LOL! :-)

Speaking of cool toys... here's {{gwi:165345}} on Friday. It gets GREAT gas mileage. :-)

Here is a link that might be useful: Cool toy found by a great cyber friend.

WOW!! Lovely commute Semper!

I have about 22 miles of highway and country roads complete with road kill woodchucks and squished squirrels.

So, ya gonna get the kayak for your B-Day? :-)