Catherine,

Yes, some dowsers can dowse people too.

Anne

Thanks Anne and Lefd.
Lefd......I've talked to so many women with the same problem. Some women even developed a fear of leaving the house after menopause.
I started a very low dose of the med yesterday, and I woke up in the middle of the night with horrible symptoms that are still with me. I don't see how I can make it through this, but I guess we'll see. Its like my neuro system is just too danged sensitive.
I don't want to go through hell getting adjusted to it, and then find out I don't like it, and then have to go through hell coming off it.
Have you tried something for anxiety, rather than depression? I'm using a little xanax, but because of its addictive qualities, I'm trying to use it sparingly.......which is really hard if I'm freaking out 24/7!
Good luck to you on your journey through this obnoxious (and scary) time of life!

Hi Catherinet,
It does take a few days for your body to adjust to the med. They usually start you out on half the dose.
Funny, the comment on Paxil. How different each of us are in our bodies. I was on a low dose of Paxil for about 6 mos. and LOVED it! I was so easy going and felt like a real person again. When I weaned myself off of it, I realized that I was more in control of the anxiety attacks. I convinced myself if I could be ok on the Paxil, I could be ok off of it. Somehow, the experience of being on the drug gave me more confidence in myself. I still have anxiety, but am able to control how I react to it. It's hard sometimes and sometimes I do have to break off a piece of xanax, just a small piece, and it's enough to get me thu the height of the attack.

Keep up the journaling! Ask your doctor about your dose and how you feel. I'm about to have a colonoscopy and am SO fearing what that drug they give people to relax before is going to do to me! I don't like the feeling of not being in control and woosy or strange sensations gives me anxiety too.

Recently my primary care doctor (female) said this about my stress complaint, "Oh you poor thing, you have no hormones to help you deal." pfffft! :)

Catherine, I am praying for you that your doctor will do what is best for you and you can feel better real soon. I can't relate to depression or anxiety attacks. I have been through menopause and without the benefit of any HRT. When I developed breast cancer the doctor was really glad that he had not prescribed hormones because then we didn't have to wonder if the cancer was hormone induced. God and my faith got me through the breast cancer. Since I had regular mammograms, it was caught at an extremely early stage. 1 Millimeter. I elected not to have surgery or Radiation, but had more frequent mammograms until the doctor was satisfied that it was not going to come back. Now it has been about 13 years and I have my mammograms every year faithfully. I was having pains that I thought might be heart related, but turned out to be only acid-reflux. And now that I take Nexium that is under control also. My brother was born with a defective hip and has suffered with it all his life. Over the last few years, the pain had gotten so unbearable that he was really depressed. So now that he is on an antidepressent and is on very serious pain meds, he is a changed person. He's still in pain, but he has a much better outlook on life. So here's hoping that you, too will be able to find out what works for you and you'll be happy and carefree soon. Glenda

Thanks grandmapoo and Glenda.

I started out on 1/4 pill and today I'm going up to 1/2.....which frightens me. I just can't believe the reaction my body has to change.
Grandmapoo.......I think that does happen sometimes......that the meds allow you to learn how to react to stress differently and and you can react that way without the meds later. Good luck with your colonoscopy. Here's some encouragement for you.......I am a very anxious person, and the colonoscopy was a piece of cake for me! The worst part (besides drinking all that stuff), was getting so cold from not eating! I don't remember a thing during the test, and I had no anxiety. You'll be fine! And you'll be so relieved afterwards that you had it done. Good luck!
Glenda.......I'm so glad your cancer is under control. You're so lucky to never have had depression or anxiety! And I'm glad your brother found relief with the meds.
I'm taking the higher dose of the medicine this afternoon. I almost feel like I'm taking cyanide or something! I'm learning to try to stop running from scary feelings, and just feel them. I'm sure that will take alot of practice!

Thanks grandmapoo and Glenda for your encouragement!

Catherine,

I'm praying for you. I know how much courage it takes to face the anxiety and take a new path choosing meds.

When I was adjusting to the meds and didn't like how I was feeling, I just reminded myself that I had a choice of being anxiety ridden for the rest of my life or go through a bit of discomfort for a short period of time and then not have the anxiety attacks that paralyzed me.

The problem, of course, is that I couldn't imagine what it would be like to live without constant anxiety attacks. It's great - I know that now!!

And, yes, I do sometimes start to get an anxiety attack, but I can breathe through it, without it going full blown.
I have xanax in case I need it for a specific purpose: ie - lumbar puncture!!!

Anne

Thanks Anne.

That helps me too........thinking about having this level of anxiety and depression for the rest of my life. I just couldn't deal with it. It makes some of these side-effects and new sensations easier to take. I'm looking forward to feeling different and not being anxious all the time!
Thanks again.
P.S. are you getting a lumbar puncture?

Hope you're soon on the mend, Cath! Keep far away from the side effects of any meds! (Don't ask me how we know this.)

Thanks CD3!
LOL I know just what you mean!

Catherine,

One of the funniest experiences I had after I started taking medication for anxiety, depression and ADHD was when something happened that normally would have sent me into a mind-blowing anxiety attack. I sailed through the experience in a positive, beneficial way. Later that night I realized what had happened (or not happened as the case may be) and almost had an anxiety attack over not having had one. hahaha

I have had two lumbar punctures and may have a 3rd, hopefully that will be the last.

The first one, it was all I could do to keep from screaming, not from pain, just from anxiety; the poor Dr didn't know what to do with me deep breathing and ohming. hahaha

But, he's one of the sweetest men, not to mention, Doctors, I've ever met. He takes the time to listen to what you have to say and actually responds accordingly. He is an angel in the Hospital. Everyone, patients and nurses alike love him.

The second one, I used Xanex. That made the experience much less anxiety-ridden for me and, I'm sure, much less stressful and puzzling for the Dr.

Anne

Well, best of luck to you Anne. I'm glad you have a nice doc.
Did the deep breathing help at all? You made me think of my labor with my second child. I didn't attend any classes, but just watched a Lamaze-type video and practiced breathing. But during the labor, all I did was scream like a Banshee.
I have to take xanax for MRIs. They are my "LP"s.

I was one of the original test subjects for bio-feedback training back in the 70's. It has helped me all my life in many different situations. Deep breathing is part of that.

I've always wanted to try the biofeedback stuff. Are they still doing it? Do they hook you up to a monitor? I can make my heartrate go faster at will, but I can't slow it down......which is unfortunate. haha I think that's the opposite of what biofeedback is about.

Catherine,

I don't know if they are still doing biofeedback training. I think it should be taught in kindergarten.

I was hooked up to a monitor. The great thing about that was that "you" didn't have to do anything to slow the heartbeat. The body learned it on its own. That's what the monitor was for. I could actually feel my body enjoying the experience and looking forward to the next session. I guess basically it is giving up control and allowing nature to balance itself.

I believe that meditation, Tai Chi, Yoga, etc are also a form of bio feedback as far as balancing oneself.
Anne

Thanks Anne.......I think LOTS of things should be taught to kids starting in kindergaren that aren't!
I'm only at half the 50mg dose of this med, and I am so exhausted I can hardly function. Does that go away???
I've wasted so many years with fibromyalgia being exhausted, and this past year, it was doing better. I certainly don't want to go back to being exhausted all the time again.

Catherine,

When I first started taking the medication I was just dragging through the day, but realized it was because I had been taking herbal supplements for calming down and to help me sleep. Once I stopped them, the exhaustion went away. So, if you are taking any herbal supplements, that might be the first place to adjust.

If you aren't, this might be something to discuss with your Dr. I don't know if the adjustment period includes being that tired.

Good luck!!
Anne

Catherine ....

Just wondering .... how are things? Is it getting any better?

Hi jeanner,
Thanks for asking.
I'm going up on the med at a snail's pace. Tomorrow I will go up to the full dose. I kept having important events to deal with, and didn't want to change anything until I got through those. So far, so good. I'm not skipping and laughing yet. ;)
In fact, I can't tell too much difference yet, except that the panic is a bit less. I'm also on a beta blocker, which helps to keep my heart from racing.....which would always send me into panic.
My son is leaving for his 2nd year of college in a little over a week.........which causes great turmoil and emotion. (Great sadness, interspersed with ecstasy). hahahaha
I still have episodes of weakness, shaking and sweating, which I'm not sure is related to panic/anxiety. It might be hormonal. Die you ovaries, die!! haha
Someone told me once that the pain of childbirth wasn't god's punishment to Eve for eating the apple.........it's menopause! haha
Anyhow.......probably more info than you really wanted, but I do thank you for asking.
Hopefully, before long, I'll be the life of the party, and become a social butterfly. Well, maybe not. But hopefully I'll be just a little happier.
Thanks Jean!

"Die you ovaries, die!!"

LOL!!! Oh, Catherine, you always seem to have such a great outlook on things, such a great spirit, I never would have guessed from your previous posts how much you've been suffering....until this thread. I sure hope you find some sort of peace soon! You definitely deserve it. :)

Brenda

Thanks Brenda!
What a nice thing to say! That does more for me than any medicine could! :)

Cathy, Good to read you are still cheerful and looking on the sunny side of life.
I cannot say I that I'm in tune with what you are going through!
I always thought that Menopause, was when women took a break away from having contact with men???
And being a man, I could never understand why they would want to!!??

Anyway, I hope all becomes right for you soon.
You are a boon to this forum and always manage to put a smile on this old face.
"Horton"

Thanks Horton.
What a nice compliment! :)
Do any of you remember a short-lived comedy series called "Dinosaurs"? It was a very funny, intelligent show. They were dinosaurs, but were living like humans. Anyhow, they had a show on "hurling". It was when dinosaurs would get old, they'd instinctually know to go to the tar pit and hurl themselves into it.....thus making room in life for more younger dinosaurs.
Well, I'm starting to think that the craziness of menopause is nature's way of telling us to go hurl ourselves! lol!
I'm not quite ready to go yet, plus I don't know where any tar pits are. :)

LOL!!! You 2 are funny! Catherine, I think most of us dinosaurs will have to make the pilgrimage to the infamous La Brea Tar Pits in Los Angeles. I'll meet you out front. I'll be wearing a pink-flowered muumuu and sporting a hair net.

Brenda

LOLOLOLOLOLOL Brenda!!
Its a date. I'll be lookin' for ya!

Catherine,

Hope you keep improving.

lisa

Hmmmm, can't tell if the drugs are working or if she's finally snapped.....lol. (However I do want to be included in the LA Tar Pit Gang when my time comes...(o:

Sorry Cath, couldn't help myself! I really do hope you're feeling better. Stick with it, and if this med doesn't work go back, and back, and back 'til you and your doctor figure out whats right for you. You deserve it. Big Hugs!!!

Sarah

I'll be the one with the pink fuzzy slippers!

A snail's pace is a GOOD thing - you don't want to be making any drastic changes on top of everything else.
Hang in there!

Thanks everyone,

You keep me laughing! :)

Horton, don't be silly. Menopause is the time when a woman can feel as sexy as she wants and there aren't any reminders 9 months later. There's games in the bedroom and games in the bathroom and games in a dark corner of the porch and games in the kitchen and office and..... Sandy

I don't know, Sandy. I've never been a big fan of Monopoly. Maybe Trivial Pursuit. Hard to read the cards on a dark porch, though...:D

Brenda

You are hysterical Brenda!!!

Ok, let this old country gal tell you what menopause means in Texas. It's simply to stop fishing with a minnow and tryin' another bait. :)

Catherinet, hang in there. I'm glad you feel even a little less anxious. Any little bit helps.
((((HUGS))))

LOL!! Yet another reason to love Texas, 'Poo! And GO, COWBOYS! :D

Thanks, Catherine. I cause hysteria wherever I go, and I thought that was a bad thing. LOL Hope your son made it off to college ok! And I hope you're weathering life better each day. :)))

Brenda

Thanks grandmapoo.
Brenda, sometimes hysteria is a really good thing! :)
We took our son to college yesterday. Talk about yin/yang, bitter/sweet, agony/ecstasy!
I do miss him and will worry about him, but I can actually hear myself think now and don't have to argue all day long! Hey.....maybe I won't even need an antidepressant now! lolol!

Your welcome, Catherinet.
I hope your son isn't so very far from home that a visit can't be arranged. I have fond memories of visiting my step son @ Texas A&M. It's truly bitter sweet, as you said.

Brenda, love Texas but don't be fooled. Texas women get REALLY grouchy when their minnow won't wiggle no more!
Go Dallas Cowboys and Houston Texans! :)

Oh, yes, the arguing. It's SO nice when step-son comes to visit now that he's breaking rules on his own time...and not talking back on mine! :D

Not sure if it's the Cali girl in me...or the Idaho(an)? Maybe the Irish/German...but I have grouchy down to a science, and I'm still using minnows. LOL

Brenda

I boo-hoo'd for weeks when my son went to college. He is our youngest (child #2). My daughter had a fit; said I didn't boo-hoo like that over her going off to college (I did but she didn't know it).

The situation with my son was different; he was accidentally shot and left paralyzed at age 16. Lots of rehab and work to get him where he could live alone on a college campus. First week there he calls me at 11:30pm and tells me he's bleeding when he caths...told him to watch closely to see if it became worse..if so to go to the ER at the hospital near him; otherwise he should go to the campus clinic the next morning and leave a urine sample. I could not sleep all night worrying that I gave him bad advise--that he was lying there bleeding to death. Turns out it was just another bladder infection.

He is now 36 and I still get phone calls that keep me awake all night but they are not as often. He is married so I don't worry about his falling and not able to get up, etc.

The Joys of Motherhood!

Peggy

We never stop worrying, do we Peggy? As they say, being a parent is a life sentence!

How you doin', Catherine? :-)

Thanks for asking CD3.
I'm doing fairly well. I seem to have adjusted fairly quickly to the med. I'm thinking of asking to go up on the dose, since I'm not laughing hysterically yet. :)
I did have a panic attack last night while watching the RNC though. Sorry! I just couldn't resist!! :)

Catherine, I had a panic attack, too! But it was during the DNC last week. *Twilight Zone music* LOL!!

Maybe we both inhaled some of those (expensive) gas fumes. Happy pills are probably a LOT cheaper than those fumes, though. :D

Hope you continue to adjust and get to laughing your patooty off soon!!

Brenda

Good to hear you are doing well, Catherine!

DON'T WATCH THE DEBATES!!!!!!!!! :-)

LOL you two!
CD3......what's the VCN? Is that a convention I missed? or is that your favorite adjective to describe that "other" party........the one that made me panic? teehee
Here's a very interesting side-effect I've gotten from the med: I don't want to eat veggies any more. Isn't that weird?? I ate them constantly before and loved them. I'm sort of bummed. I know they're good for me, but they just don't interest me anymore. I eat them though. Just not as much fun.
Unfortunately, I've become more interested in hot fudge sundaes. uh oh........

That's odd! Not wanting your veggies? I *know* that sometimes medications will alter the taste buds so certain foods taste odd or horrid and taste for foods can abruptly change! Mmmmm. Hot fudge! :-)

The VNC? Uhhhhh .... It's a term for the cause of Brenda's panic. NO NEED TO PANIC, BRENDA, dearest! There was a guy who put a home-made sign in his front lawn a while ago ... {{gwi:163109}}

Soooooooo ..... It became the VNC. :-)

Doesn't matter. DON'T WATCH THE DEBATES!

I wonder if I start taking some of those meds, I'll crave veggies. :D I think I need a taste bud implant or something.

Debates, polls, media...they all frighten me. I also need a valve implant to shut it off!! :D

Brenda

Medications can cause conditions that mess up your taste buds. About 3 or 4 years ago my doctor insisted I use an inhaler to prevent bronchitis. I didn't like it but stopped using it too late to prevent several infections including Thrush which ruined my sense of taste. The Thrush came back twice. It might be years before I can taste properly or at all. About the only thing that has any flavor now is berry flavored chewing gum. :( Sandy

That's interesting about taste changing. I don't take any meds except Nexium and HBP meds and have taken them for many years. But the fast foods are really turning me off. I just got some french fries from Wendys yesterday and they had such a bad taste I couldn't eat them. They left a bitter taste in my mouth. I think it's whatever they cook them in now. A few days ago we ate at Western Sizzlin and I had some pork chops that taste like they were fried in used motor oil. Hubby mostly ate from the salad bar. We both got a case of the Green Apple Footsteps. Guess if I have to start eating things that actually taste good, I'll lose some weight. That's a good thing. Glenda

OMG Sandy,

Just read this post and you talked about thrush. That is a nasty, nasty word in my book. I supposedly have asthma and am on the inhaler Advair. After too many, too many bouts with thrush I went cold turkey off of Advair. I got thrush back in February. It got so bad it went to my throat and tonsils. Even my gums were bleeding. I couldn't even drink tea I was in so much agony. I lost 5# because I couldn't eat. I still had thrush in May after a month of being on Diflucam to take it away. I could eat but it still hurt, and forget about taste. I lived on applesauce, jello and pudding.

On Father's Day this year I thought I had a small stoke. It felt like someone had stabbed me in the left side of my head with a sharp pencil, then my whole left side went numb, even my tongue. The MRI showed I had a slight brain aneurysm that had healed itself. That was it. I decided the Lord gave me a second chance at life and I wasn't going to abuse it. I am now on a strict low-sodium diet. I have lost 30#. It seems like the pounds are just melting away. If it ain't natural it ain't going in my body. I gave up diet pop, and anything with splenda, neutrasweet or aspartame in it. I have been told I have had asthma and allergies my whole life, and I can't believe the difference. I haven't used an inhaler since February and don't have a problem breathing. I haven't had an asthma attack (thank God) and this is the first year I haven't sneezed my head off during allergy season. I am up to 1.60 miles on the manual treadmill and can bench press 50# on the Bowflex. I don't care what my allergist tells me, I refuse to put anymore steroids into my body. That's what caused the thrush in my mouth and throat, steroids in the Advair inhaler. I feel like I have been reborn.

Jenny

I know these post are old, but I'm reading them for the first time and FINALLY someone else get's it and I'm not crazy! I'm 46 and have been struggling for 6-8 months. The stories are exactly like mine. Heart palpitations, Dr/cardiologist appt. heart monitor EKG, cardiogram, heart ultrasound...all came up neg. Thyroid and blood are normal and my cholesterol is outstanding...so what the hell is wrong with me?! I'm in panic most of the time, to the point where I was worried about driving for fear that I'd have a heart attack on the highway. I've got insomnia (usually 4-5 hours pr night), pain in my throat (probably from jamming my fingers into my pulse point) I can't remember ANYTHING, I'm miserable and depressed and feel like I'm dying or have cancer, all the time.
I just started taking Magnesium and have been taking calcium for 3 years since my Mum died of complications of osteoporosis. I do freelance work, thank goodness because I could not work F/T feeling the way I do. You ladies have helped me so much tonight...I'm elated and feel empowered for the first time in months

Hi sher-sytlist!

I'm still here! I'm sorry to hear you're having such a hard time. I think some women, during perimenopause, begin to lose alot of their muscle strength......especially in their throats......which can cause sleep apnea. I started using a cpap machine around the time I initially started this thread, and it has made a huge difference in my life. If you snore alot, or wake up alot at night, and feel really fatigued during the day, maybe you should consider having a sleep study done.
Seems like some women can just breeze through perimenopause, and others of us go through hell.

I'm 64 now. I actually ended up in the E.R. again about 2 months ago because of a fast heart rate. Everything was normal. So I guess I might still be having panic attacks.

Xanax is a nice drug to have around to occasionally take during those times.

Good luck to you Sher! And just know that this WILL pass sometime!