Gee Mere,I would have thought you and hemlock were a natural.

Oh, don't tempt me... Hell hath no fury!!!!!

...You did mean for one, the other or both, didn't you [bwhahaha!]

I'm just fed up and gonna take my toys and play by myself ;]

Still, Hemlocks have gotta spread at least 4 inches, eh? Hahaha... what can you do?

She may not realize, or can't visualize, how much they spread, especially if she's not a "garden person".

(The very first things I planted here were 2 crepe myrtles.
right on the property line.
What was I thinking???
that I was planting telephone poles?)

Now, I always measure with string or cord from a stake where the trunk is to be.

& those shrubs won't know the difference if they're moved right away.

If the Hemlocks are on your side of the property, you can do what you like with them. :^)

Going with Sylvia's thought... What about asking her to move them more into her property, because each plant can get so wide and it will be sooo much easier for her to maintain her hedge that way? You could even help her lay it out. Wouldn't that be nice of you? ;-) The assertive - helpful - friendly approach might work.

Can you put up some stakes and string on the border as part of your work to lay out your fence? A visual aid might help, too.

Cheers,
Michelle

I was just noticing a rose...Mutabilis has grown to where it is on the neighbor's side...I don't think the present neighbor's mind...but if they move...the next one, might, and it will be that much wider, by then....what to do?
And Mere, most days, animals are more fun to be around, than most people,,,some more than others.

A friend has a line of Tsugas to give them some privacy from where a two lane country road was expanded to five to allow for more subdivisions.
In front of the Tsugas she has a Rosarium Untersen covered arch that has the best color in front of the Tsugas of any rose/green background I've seen in this part of the world.

LOL at roaring back at each other!! Must be neighbor roaring day - lots of that happening across the street. I stayed way out of it...

Yikes. I'd do something about the driveway though - some states have laws that allow the "taking" of land if the use is uncontested over a certain period of time.

Thank you, Jody. Yep, we are now experts in adverse possession law, so that's covered. The crazy things people do, and she is precisely the type to try that... and she grew up here and wants what she wants, etc.

But y'all, extreme craziness abounds. There is so much more drama since I posted this, I am embarrassed for them and stunned and shaking my head.

Suffice it to say, Michelle, the assertive- helpful-friendly approach can not make a raving loony sniff the smelling salts! And Sylvia, I smiled at your post... that's cute and reminds me of me and no problem, etc. This has turned out to be some very strange other animal, indeed...

OK... turns out she is not speaking to me, will not even give a nod to poor BeeBee who thinks she's gone deaf or he's turned invisible, and this is insane. Apparently she thinks I'm after her husband or he's after me, or some combination of utter ridiculousness, that I say get me a 100 ft pole to not touch it with!

So today I got some money she owed me from her husband at his gas station and explained that she is not speaking to me, I do not do well with that, so they can tell me if I need to return anything I may have forgotten or whatever, and that will be that. I wasn't angry, just clear and 'professional.'

So who knew?? Tsugas all around, lol ;]

They do make beautiful backdrops, and right about now I'm not minding that at all!!!

Signed -- Color me Stunned in NC!

PS - I wrote my other neighbor a nice apology note earlier on and we had a talk and that's no biggie, ironically. I'd have thought she was the more difficult of the two. Ya never know

anything, sometimes, I guess.

I hear ya,

But I found sanity again when I stopped trying to figure people out!:)

Mostly my boss and our customers. I take things alot lighter now.

People do weird crap, and you'll only find yourself in a fitting room full of straight-jackets if you try to understand why.

My hairline started moving closer to my eyebrows again after I gave up my need to understand everyones actions.:)

...SO..., now you're a homewrecker? LOL

What ever will be, will be...

Smell the roses,
BC:)

Geeze Mere...

We paved our driveway 2 years ago. The guy did a lousy job, it squished out and onto the neighbors property. The only way to remove it is to cut it out. We haven't done that yet, although we planned to. Have the paving guy come back and talk to him about doing that.

Hemlocks are huge. What was she thinking? I think I would get the fence guy out pronto, think about getting the fence put in now. They will surely grow over the line, if you cut them on your side it totally ruins the look. Are you going to have a surveyer come out?

Well, one good thing to come of this, she won't be borrowing the mower lol

I'm so sick of neighbors. You try to be nice then get pooped on. Wonder if she'll let you see the kids any more. That's the hardest. I was relieved when my iron borrowing neighbor moved, some of the stunts she pulled were low. I don't get it. She borrowed & broken my iron & 2 cell phones, yet I'm the one that's the (insert word here)... Halloween they brought the kids over, hadn't seen them in months. I was then outside working in the garden, kneeling on their property... Out she comes with the 3 youngest to pick up the oldest from the bus... She puts my little sweetie girl on her right side, then proceeds to drive the carriage on the grass, walking as far from me as possible. She made sure my little sweetie girl didn't see me. I didn't get to say good bye to the kids. The mother was shipping them off to their G'ma's, they were loaded in the car, my husband almost didn't get to say goodbye. It's probably for the best, it hurt me to see the kids go, couldn't imagine how the little ones felt.

Funny how people think. She swore to everyone that would listen that I gave her a broken iron, which is hilarious if you know me. I'm so anal about replacing things I think are going. Worked fine to iron my clothes for dad's viewing.

I wonder if yours will start telling stories too. Mere the home-wrecker. If she was so worried about her husband doing something behind her back, why did she even start a friendship?

That is the pits. I am glad you are at peace with your other neighbor... It is just the worst having terrible neighbors - my terrible neighbor moved on and a good one moved in, and it is SUCH a huge relief.

Cheers,
Michelle

Yes, I'm Mere The Accidental Homewrecker, BC, lol. It's a Homewrecker Hemlock Hedge, bwahaha!

Oh my. Thanks for the thoughts!... I'm just gonna get a C'est La Vie T-shirt to wear in the yard ;]

Sue, the effect on the children is certainly the saddest part. I told the hubby that I still plan on saying hello and whatever to the kids, 'cos they're kids!, if she'll let me. The day I first got the complete cold shoulder, the 9 year old was talking to me from their yard about his yellow flower pot for a second, and she yelled at him to come there ASAP, in a voice that I disagree with. Poor kids didn't do a darned thing.

I can't believe your neighbor didn't let you say goodbye... the kids enjoy somebody and it freaks them out if suddenly civility doesn't even exist.

'If she's worried about hubby'... yeah, not really going there except I'll say once that it dawned on me that she's seemed irritiated by me losing a great deal of weight over the past year. I still know nothing, but I had already mentally noted to keep the shorts in the closet, etc, to be as polite as possible RE: any insecurities she had about that subject.

I'm sure there's more, and oh yes is she talking. I'm telling folks let's not discuss it, though, 'cos I'm fine with civil and just wish them all well.

Michelle, the other neighbor is also my cousin and this area was populated by a wonderful older generation that is now gone, so I am glad in the end that we got to vent about how we all miss how things used to be. We miss my Grandmother and her mother and all of their sisters living here, and there's just no denying that those transistions hurt. I'm glad, too, that we had our talk. Thanks :)

Hey, she very pleasantly asked me if the kids could see me today! They played in my yard while I gardened, and it was great fun :)

Well, you can always invite the neighbor over for some tea and Socratic questioning. . .

Alternatively, Roundup works wonders.

But if those trees encroach on your property, in most jurisdictions you can cut them back any way you like. If that accidentally kills the trees - better luck next time.

As far as the driveway, if it is 4 feet on your property, you really need to get that portion removed or have them purchase the easement. If you let it go, knowing that it is your property, you may end up losing it legally too.

There is an old doctrine of "adverse possession" that lets someone claim another's property by "occupying" it if his occupation is open, notorious and visible and in direct defiance of the true owner, who is on notice but takes no action. Generally after a period of time, say 7 years or so, the property can actually be claimed by the adverse possessor and title will transfer. So you need to put in writing that the pavement is on your property or you can lose it forever. And as far as maintaining good relations w the neighbors goes - those relations are not worth maintaining if they are stealing from you.

LOL, oh that she were into Socratic questioning... meaning either way, actually, lol. Not the most mentally stimulating of pals, actually ;]

Now she's had hubby extend their solid-wood fencing more panels towards their horse pasture, again without waiting to see if the survey shows that that is a bad idea.

Ooops if so... and not the same oops as when we were being mutually respectful [ahem, in each other's presence, anyway... yes, STOLEN plants!]

And weeding behind their fence is going to be very difficult with the odd, small shape they are bound to leave. My fence will have a discreet electric strand on that side [dogs and many burgulars] and they know it.

Adverse possession is covered, truly. Dad has his own company so always has a lawyer on hire, and we have GIVEN permission for her to USE it until we say otherwise, which could be any time. With the new fencing coming in, I think it's a good time to break out the sledgehammer, too!

sounds like this is going to be fun...

Indeed so.

Good that you have a lawyer. This is the kind of stuff we like.

Do let us know what happens.

I'll keep y'all posted, lol. No real sledgehammers, of course... I have a bad back and cousin-neighbor might seriously have a heart attack!

It'll be all legal-polite, but yeah, I expect a few fireworks... impossible to avoid with those two on so many things.

Mamas don't let your babies grow up to be DramaQueens ;]