|
| A year-plus ago our dear Hortster
had no clue that he'd struck such a chordster with folks in their yards who soon became bards. Number 150 was your rewardster! |
Follow-Up Postings:
|
| As autumn occurs in the yard, The gaertner recurs as a bard. This one is on YOU - Ain't mine to renew! Once more we must view the absard. |
|
- Posted by nygardener z6 New York (My Page) on Sat, Sep 24, 11 at 10:37
| A love-smitten gaertner named Schreber Made a wonderful heap for his neighbor. But when she loved him not He cried out, "Let it rot!" And abandoned his steamy love's labor. |
|
| But the neighbor won out all the same, being a very resourceful young dame. Although Schreber was gone, the pile cooked on and on, and she had compost to use in her name. Claire |
|
- Posted by nygardener z6 New York (My Page) on Sat, Sep 24, 11 at 16:00
| Lovesick Schreber went home to Westphalia With his gardening paraphernalia. He tended his pile In the Teutonic style Wearing full RheinlandKompost regalia. |
|
- Posted by rosiew 8 GA (rosemarywalsh@bellsouth.net) on Sat, Sep 24, 11 at 17:37
| Marvelous stuff. Please keep them coming. |
|
| I looked up "Limerick" in my dictionary. According to it, we are expounders of: 1) a nonsense poem of five anapestic lines, now often bawdy, usually with the rhyme scheme aabba, the first, second and fifth lines having three stresses, the third and fourth, two: the form was popularized by Edward Lear (Example: There was a young lady named Harris, / Whom nothing could ever embarrass / Till the bath salts one day / In the tub where she lay / Turned out to be plaster of Paris). Seems to fit this group! (Most must be plastered). hortster |
|
| Poor Schreber was then sent away from his homeland the very next May. The local forum police claimed "disturbing the peace" but absurdity will still have its day. Claire |
|
- Posted by schreber_gaertner Ca 9/10 (My Page) on Sun, Sep 25, 11 at 18:46
| So now I'm the one being blamed? Though I do feel somewhat ashamed, the fault's not all mine, I have partners in crime-- it's abundantly clear I've been framed. |
|
- Posted by nygardener z6 New York (My Page) on Mon, Sep 26, 11 at 11:36
| A gardener who hailed from Piraeus Had a heap that would shock and dismay us. He filled it with gristle And odd bits of thistle And species unknown to Linnaeus. |
|
- Posted by nygardener z6 New York (My Page) on Mon, Sep 26, 11 at 15:18
| Don Quixote rode to Abyssinia, To find the world's finest red zinnia. He fed it (of course) With manure from his horse, To win favor from lovely Dulcinea. |
|
- Posted by nygardener z6 New York (My Page) on Mon, Sep 26, 11 at 15:25
| Make that, "A grizzled old Greek from Piraeus ...." |
|
- Posted by toxcrusadr (My Page) on Mon, Sep 26, 11 at 15:54
| A three legged dog and a snake Chased a mouse round a heap by the lake Napping nearby The gardener said "Why, I'll whack ye with this bloody rake!" |
|
- Posted by schreber_gaertner (My Page) on Mon, Sep 26, 11 at 22:46
| This weekend had no time for play I turned all three piles in one day. Giving poetry a crack does no good for my back. Ibuprofen now take me away! |
|
- Posted by schreber_gaertner (My Page) on Mon, Sep 26, 11 at 22:56
| My new next door neighbor's a wench who complains that my pile has a stench. I'll show this loud phobic a real smell--anaerobic by giving the pile a good good drench! |
|
- Posted by nygardener z6 New York (My Page) on Tue, Sep 27, 11 at 10:05
| That cantankerous neighboring wench Must not know that you're truly a Mensch. When the odor wafts closer She'll just get verboser As your pile's thirst you labor to quench. |
|
- Posted by nygardener z6 New York (My Page) on Tue, Sep 27, 11 at 10:11
| My heap's almost done for the season, So I'm writing this rhyme for a reason. I'll soon take my shovel From my gardening hovel And turn all my lettuce and peas in. |
|
- Posted by gonebananas 7/8 (My Page) on Tue, Sep 27, 11 at 10:35
| What about haiku? 5-7-5 Some are chemophobes |
|
- Posted by nygardener z6 New York (My Page) on Tue, Sep 27, 11 at 10:56
| There once was a gardener named Bright Whose neutrinos grew faster than light. She planted one day In the usual way What she'd reaped on the previous night! |
|
- Posted by nygardener z6 New York (My Page) on Tue, Sep 27, 11 at 11:08
| For gardeners who favor haiku There's a composting thread just for you. Though these metrical manias Can be spontaneous You can use them to scoop up what's gnu. |
|
| A venerable Wizard from Oz, hid his compost with curtains of gauze. Along came Dorothy and new pals, who doubted his credentials, then tore off the gauze just because. |
|
- Posted by schreber_gaertner (My Page) on Tue, Sep 27, 11 at 13:01
| I'm attending a long deposition. My mind has come to the decision that these lawyers' best use would be as refuse to speed my pile's decomposition. |
|
- Posted by schreber_gaertner (My Page) on Tue, Sep 27, 11 at 13:30
| My soil's a bit nitrogen-weak. So I developed a modern technique to convert scraps like gruel into high-nitro fuel. Her name's Daisy--she lays five eggs a week! |
|
- Posted by schreber_gaertner (My Page) on Tue, Sep 27, 11 at 16:13
| ny, short on browns, got so cranky, he considered composting his hankies. Schreber said "better keep them, you'll probably need them when my Angels keep beating your Yankees!" (I shouldn't talk--at least you made the playoffs) |
|
| I 'posted some foliage of Quercus, And my neighbor said I was a jerkus. Said he, "What a waste. That stuff isn't chaste." He's a clown that belongs in the circus. I showed that clown up much, much later He said, "I'll sue for all you are worth!" |
|
- Posted by nygardener z6 New York (My Page) on Tue, Sep 27, 11 at 16:30
| In Oz there's a magical toad Who deposits a golden, square load. In just a short while You can build a fine pile: Just follow the yellow brick road. |
|
- Posted by nygardener z6 New York (My Page) on Tue, Sep 27, 11 at 16:58
| On the diamond, the Yanks may be choking, But their clubhouse has truly been smoking. Those composted buns Have been real home runs With no pitching -- just turning and poking. |
|
| In front of two hunters, an abyss The bottom of which was a guess. So they threw in a stump From a pile, for the thump. And soon things would be quite a mess. They jumped when a rustle they heard Quite puzzled, they both would say, "Why?" Farmer Jim-Bob then froze like a bump. |
|
- Posted by schreber_gaertner (My Page) on Thu, Sep 29, 11 at 15:58
| A gardener who was not very bright tried composting live dynamite. If it's green or it's brown doesn't matter much now. For he's taken his craft to new heights. |
|
- Posted by schreber_gaertner (My Page) on Fri, Sep 30, 11 at 11:11
| I don't understand the hysteria over cantaloupe rife with listeria. I'll just put the rind (all I can find) in the pile with more greens like wisteria. (I don't mean to make light--I know many people have died. I just couldn't get the rhymes out of my head) |
|
- Posted by nygardener z6 New York (My Page) on Fri, Sep 30, 11 at 16:26
| A fellow whose soil couldn't cope Wooed his neighbor, a gardener, with hope. He cried, "Honeydew!" But she said, "Not with you! You don't compost, so I cantaloupe." |
|
- Posted by hosenemesis SoCal Sunset 19 USDA (My Page) on Wed, Oct 5, 11 at 20:58
| Bravo! |
|
- Posted by nygardener z6 New York (My Page) on Mon, Jan 23, 12 at 22:31
| Eleven fine limericks on compost Were inscribed on Saigon's tallest lamppost. "The ground all around it Quickly abounded With blooms," said the staid Vietnam Post. |
|
- Posted by schreber_gaertner CA 9/10 (My Page) on Thu, May 10, 12 at 20:10
| The bermuda is so supersized, my garden now gets criticized. So it's time to get drastic I'll lay down the plastic. In 3 months it'll be solarized! |
|
- Posted by schreber_gaertner (My Page) on Wed, May 16, 12 at 20:13
| Yesterday in our local co-op tent someone asked what the name on my plot meant. It's from when I was startin' with my Schrebergarten (or what Flora would call an "allotment"). |
|
| For more limerick posts Schreber is yearning, so he keeps adding new material and turning. But the response is not there and the cupboard is bare. The literary fire is not burning. Claire |
|
- Posted by Garden_Gekko none (My Page) on Thu, May 17, 12 at 20:51
| There once was a farmer named Lyman Who wooed a young maid with his rhymen In the garden one day On some hay she did lay And said "compost's all turnin and timin" |
Please Note: Only registered members are able to post messages to this forum. If you are a member, please log in. If you aren't yet a member, join now!
Return to the Soil Forum
Instructions
- You must be a registered member and logged in to post messages on our forums.
- Posting is a two-step process. Once you have composed your message, you will be taken to the preview page. You will then have a chance to review the contents and make changes.
- After posting your message, you may need to refresh the forum page in order to see it.
- It is illegal to post copyrighted material without the owner's consent.
- HTML codes are allowed in the message field only.
- No advertising is allowed in any of the forums.
- If you would like to practice posting or uploading photos, please visit our Test forum.
- If you need assistance, please Contact Us and we will be happy to help.