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ronald_gw

red-neck valentine's love poem

ronald
17 years ago


Collards is green my dog's name is Blue

and I'm so lucky to have a sweet thang like you.


Yore hair is like cornsilk a-flapping in the breeze

Softer than Blue's and without all them fleas.


You move like the bass, which excite me in May.

You ain't got no scales but I luv you anyway.


Yo're as satisfy'n as okry jist a-fry'n in the pan.

Yo're as fragrant as "snuff" right out of the can.


You have som'a yore teeth, for which I am proud;

I hold my head high when we're in a crowd.


On special occasions, when you shave under yore arms,

well, I'm in hawg heaven, and awed by yore charms.


Still them fellers at work, they all want to know,

what I did to deserve such a purdy, young doe.


Like a good roll of duct tape yo're there fer yore man,

to patch up life's troubles and fix what you can.


Yo're as cute as a junebug a-buzzin' overhead.

You ain't mean like those far ants I found in my bed.


Cut from the best cloth like a plaid flannel shirt,

you spark up my life more than a fresh load of dirt.


When you hold me real tight like a padded gunrack,

my life is complete; Ain't nuttin' I lack.


Yore complexion, it's perfection, like the best vinyl sidin'.

despite all the years, yore age, it keeps hidin'.


Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie with a RC cold drank,

we go together like a skunk goes with stank.


Some men, they buy chocolate for Valentine's Day;

They git it at Wal-Mart, it's romantic that way.


Some men git roses on that special day

from the cooler at Kroger. "That's impressive," I say.


Some men buy fine diamonds from a flea market booth.

"Diamonds are forever," they explain, suave and couth.


But for this man, honey, these won't do. Cause yo're too special, you sweet thang you.

I got you a gift, without taste nor odor, more useful than diamonds...


It's a new Troll'n Motor

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