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bakemom_gw

Children are Funny Things

bakemom_gw
17 years ago

Just a thought to kick around today...

I have three kids 15, 17, and 21. I started at 25 having children and stopped at 29. I am soooo looking forward to empty nest. I love all my kids, but after being a single parent for 14 years, I need my time. Our family dymanics are changing and I am enjoying my kids' pending adulthood. Everyone still ends up here and it's great and we have a blast now that the kids are older and I am not so stressed out.

At the same time, a friend of mine just gave birth. She is 10 years younger and started 10 years later. It's strange to have someone close to you beginning that journey. I am so tickled about that baby! She is a darling kitten! (that's my nickname for her. mom calls her "kitty").

Life is funny.

Comments (6)

  • ronald
    17 years ago

    Good Luck
    We also looked forward to an empty nest.
    Things happened and we ended up raising our now 20 year old grandson from birth. Along the way we picked up my Mother in law for 15 years.
    At 66 we kinda have an empty nest. All 3 kid live within 8 miles so we see our 4 grandsons often. In June we will become great grand parents.
    We love them all but sometimes its nice to be alone. LOL
    Ron

  • pitimpinai
    17 years ago

    It's kinda bewildering, isn't it? We are in the stage where our kid is trying to spread his wings. My husband is 15 years older than I. He is going to be 70 in June and our son will be 18 a couple days later. Our son has been out of the house since he was 13, first in boarding school and now college. We somehow replaced the empty nest with an exchange student who will leave the end of June. I am wondering what our life will be like after both kids are gone from the house.

    My husband and I just discussed recently that when our son finishes grad school, we should move back to the old country. Sometimes my heart still longs to be close to our son....but we really can't see ourselves living in this country on the reduced income.

  • fairydancer
    17 years ago

    I just went through the Spring vacation from h-ll. I'm a teacher, and always look forward to Spring vacation because we can all get outside. I can do some leisurely garden cleanup and the kids can run around and let off some steam. Well, this time, not a day was above 40 degrees, and there was only one afternoon we could bear to be outside for more than 10 minutes. On a limited income, there's not much to do cooped inside with a 5 and 2 year old. It was VERY depressing. Is it too early to look forward to the empty nest??!!?? On Thursday I really thought I might spank one of them, and that's something I'm personally opposed to, but I just reached my breaking point. They are just kids, and I know I wasn't happy being stuck in the house, it's not their fault.

    Luckily for me, my parents took them for the afternoon on Friday to give me some peace. I sometimes feel guilty for being so happy to have them gone for a while, but how many times can you read GO DOG GO or play Disney yahtzee before you start to lose your mind??? I often wish I was one of those parents who lets their kids just sit in front of the TV for hours upon end.....it really is like crack for kids, but each kid gets to pick one show in the morning and one show in the afternoon. I treasure that hour and boy does it go by fast!!!

    OK, enough venting. I love my kids dearly..... just a rough week.

    Deb

  • ilsa
    17 years ago

    Well, I started at 25 and finished at 35, and I honestly don't think I'll EVER have an empty nest. Prime example: DH and I were discussing just that a while back. DH jokingly commented that our oldest would probably still be living w/ us when he hit 45. My youngest son piped up from the kitchen table: "I don't want him living w/ us when he's that old!". The boys are six years apart.

    *heavy sigh* Frankly, I don't care if they stay or go when they get older. I'd be thrilled if they'd just pick up after themselves (or chip in for a weekly cleaning!!).

    Ilsa

  • laurelin
    17 years ago

    LOL, and boy can I empathize with Deb. Our kids are 8 1/2 and 5, and we started our family when I was 30. Some days I can't WAIT for the empty nest, but most days I can't imagine it. Our son has mild autism. He'll be on his own eventually, but it might take him a few years longer than the average student to achieve full independence. I don't mind if he lives at home during the first year or two of college, as long as he helps out with chores and chips in on the groceries. I suspect our daughter will give us a run for our money. We joke that our son's theme song is Sinatra's "My Way," and our daughter's is the Beach Boys' "Fun Fun Fun."

    Right now I'm trying to treasure their childhood, and to take a break whenever I can because sometimes they make me crazy. My DH is getting a crash course in my life, because with my surgery HE'S doing everything this week: the child care/refereeing, the house cleaning/shopping/meals for kids, and the home schooling (a biggie). I think it's a bit of a revelation for him, in a good way. He's a good sport, a wonderful man, and I think this gives him a new appreciation for our "teamwork."

    Laurel

  • bonnys
    17 years ago

    I had my son @ 19 and my twin daughters when I was 21....stopped right there. I spent most of their baby, toddler and early school years as a single mom and dreamed of the day I would not have to take care of someone! When I put one of my girls on a plane for boot camp I got slammed with empty nest and severe depression at the years I had wasted as strict Mom and not a more easy going one. I have five grandchildren now and all three of my kids think I was a wonderful mom.....amazing. Yeah, DH and I like our time alone but we both really love visits from the families....just not all at once as it was last weekend, haha. Treasure your time with them no matter which time it is...it's all blessings.
    Bonny