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Losing a Friend

Posted by retiredprof 7 - Northern DE (My Page) on
Fri, May 1, 09 at 18:28

I wanted to write you all yesterday about this, but didn't have the emotional stability to even get some words down.

Yesterday morning, I made the decision to put my best friend, Leather Marie, my older Dobie, down. I knew it was time (it had been coming for some weeks), and seeing her yesterday morning sealed my decision. I made an appt with the vet, brought her in, discussed options and prognosis for improvement at length. When it became clear that the time was now, I opted for peaceful euthanasia.

And, yes, I was a total mess-- a crying, heaving, I-can't-let-go-of-her animal lover. We spent 13 wonderful years together and she was truly my faithful friend through some turbulent years.

I still have Dee, of course, but the house today isn't the same. I get emotional at triggers--seeing her bowl, offering treats to "one" instead of two, not having her underfoot. Poor Dee is confused, too, suddenly unsure of her place in the pack. We're sharing sorrow and loss.

I know many of you here are animal "people" and understand the emotions wrapped up in loving and losing a close friend and loyal companion. My little memorial garden will now be expanded to include one more, and I will plant one of my WS'd perennials to help me remember her.

Say a little prayer for me and Leather Marie as we both move on to the next stage in our lives.

Prof


Follow-Up Postings:

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RE: Losing a Friend

Oh, Prof! I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your girl! You will definitely miss her for a long time. You had a long time together and that is not easy to get over. wow....13 years! you were both lucky to have each other.
Give Dee lots of hugs (she won't mind if you cry on her shoulder) and treats and ear scratches.
gg/Lois


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Those of us who have been privileged to have dear pets in our lives understand your grief. My thoughts and sympathies are with you.

Mary


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RE: Losing a Friend

Loss is one of those hard things in life that aren't ever easy to go through. We can enjoy those we still have with us, distract ourselves with activities we like and even sit to let time pass. Things will always be "different" but that sense of gut wrenching loss takes its own time to subside. It'll pop its head up periodically in the future but it won't be ever present as now.

Sorry for your loss of a devoted home friend. Feel whatever ya gotta feel and do what you are up to.

I'm just losing one of my oldest squirrels (no snickers or tree rat comments) and I'm upset...darn thing doesn't even "live" with me. We've only "known" each other for about 5 years but he's immediately identifiable by his follically-challenged tail...called a "rat tail" by others around here. I originally named him Wispytail and now he's just my little Wippie. Lord knows I couldn't take the eventual loss of a house pet who becomes a friend.

Hold your heart as gently as you held Leather Marie.

You've got plenty of people here who understand and empathize.


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It is very hard to lose a loved one, and my heart goes out to you and Dee.

PV


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This is something that PV, Mary and I know all too well. You have my heartfelt sympathy. Treat yourself gently.

http://forums2.gardenweb.com/forums/load/wtrsow/con0320521823064.html


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RE: Losing a Friend

My GW name was that of a beloved one which passed away in 2001 after being with me for 18 years. Tiffy was the friend of my life, a mix of Black Lab and Little River Duck dog. Seemed only fitting that when I discovered GW that my pen name here would be her name since she was constantly with me when gardening.

My heart is as heavy as yours in your news. May you soon find the time when the tears mix with the smiles upon remembering the precious moments you shared with Leather Marie, and may you and Dee find comfort in the days ahead.

Wish I was there to hug.


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RE: Losing a Friend

I am so sorry for your loss. I have gone through many losses, always having been owned by several cats at a time. It's odd, but at times it seems like my most recent one, "Abby Normal", is still here. I swear, she sent me our next cat! Love never dies, but sending the one who embodied it, along on their journey, is never easy. Healing takes times, but it does happen.


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Been there. Thade, a 135lb Rott/Dobie. It's hard, but we know when it's time. Sorry for your loss. It does get easier as time passes.


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RE: Losing a Friend

Prof,

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.

I too had a beloved pet and had to make the decision to put him down. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. It has been over a year for me and it does get better and will get better for you, these things take time.

Lisa


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Very sorry to read your sad news, Prof.... You did right by your girl though. She'll always be with you.
Take comfort in your memories and wrap them around you like a warm hug. We feel your pain...

Shore


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RE: Losing a Friend

  • Posted by morz8 Z8 Wa coast (My Page) on
    Sun, May 3, 09 at 14:21

Oh, I'm so sorry to be reading this today. Prof, you did the most generous and loving thing you could do for your friend even though it was very difficult for you.

Your Dee is grieving too, be sure to give both of you some time and treats.


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So sorry to hear the news,also know it's never easy but you know it's time. I love all animals, but my Lab mix Shadow was the best. I actually gave her IV fluids at home for a bit because I couldn't bear to lose her. But I knew it was time... To all those looking down on us from "Pet Heaven". Hang in there Prof!
Monica


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RE: Losing a Friend

I'm so sorry to hear this. You'll both be in prayers. Leather was very lucky to have you as a dad. You made her years here very good ones. It takes a strong and brave soul to do what is best for a loved one. You have my biggest, deepest condolences.

I'm sending you hugs.

Seedmama


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So sorry to hear about your dear companion, I'm sure you have plenty of memories that won't be forgotten. I also lost mine, he was 14. It was so lonely without a dog and a few months later we were blessed with a new puppy. He is buried out in the apple orchard but will be in our hearts forever.
((BIG hugs))
Carol


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RE: Losing a Friend

Prof,
I feel your pain. We had to put our Candy down last September--if ever there was a sweeter dog, I can't imagine her. She had a congenital heart defect that was helped a little bit by medication, but it stopped working, and the kids... Oh, we all cried, and still do. Then they came out with Marley & Me... and the puppy looks like Candy did when she was a puppy.

Feel your pain; it is how you heal and know that you are still alive. Remember her, and she will live forever in your heart. You and Dee are in my prayers.


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So sorry to hear your sad news.

Our pets become our friends, our confidants, our own shadows and it's hard to let them go when the time comes. Leather Marie was lucky to have such a caring friend and owner. Big hugs for you and Dee.


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Thank you all for your heartfelt condolences. It means a lot when you have friends who genuinely understand and care.

My son and daughter came over Saturday for dinner and we had a good cry, some laughs (remembering Rie when she was the pup from hell) and shared photos. Very cathartic for me.

Yesterday, the vet called and told me she "was back." I had her cremated privately so she could be returned to me. For the time being (until I can really let go) she now sits on my dresser in her little brocade box. I'm comforted knowing she's back home with me.

My biggest struggle is the quiet. Leather was a velcro dog--with me every moment. Dee is very independent--happy to lay in my bed all day except when it's time for a meal. She's an older girl, too--eleven. I miss the contact, though.

I may move on adopting another. I've always been a multi-dog household and need some activity and a little "carrying on."

I'm at peace with my decision about Leather Marie and I know she's a happy girl in another place. She has my love, my devotion and memories of our life together, and for that, I'll always be grateful.

Prof


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I remember saying goodbye to Abby. She was such a beauty, a long hair, Main Coon, but very small. She was my lap cat. I had this little nic-name for her, and would teasingly call her "Miss Shaggy Paws" because of the moppets at the end of her legs! We had Sunny Day at the time, but she's a wild woman. She's slightly bi-polar and a little ADHD so there's no sitting still!

My husband was completely at a loss! His pain ran very deep, Abby was our "family" before we were even family! We got her before we got married, she was "our" baby. I needed the comfort of a warm, soft lap cat. He just ached. It took time and many prayers, but he finally opened his heart just a bit and let me go pick one out.

I went to a place called Orphans of the Storm. There, they have a cat room, actually a couple of them. They must have well over 300 cats at a given time. Almost all of them a loose! I knew somewhere in there was the cat I was supposed to have. Somewhere in there was a cat who needed me as much as I needed it!

I went in one of the cat rooms and sat on the floor and waited. I closed off my vision and opened my mind and my heart. I let her come to me, I wanted the one who wanted me the most. I ended up naming her "Annie" or "Orphan Annie Mull".

I swear, my Abby sent her! She is exactly the cat I needed and the one I prayed for. Not a replacement, God knows you can't replace one for the other, more like two wounded souls there to help heal one another. Several days later, as we were getting to know each other, I noticed my short haired, tabby, has longer hair in between her toes and her paw pads. I've never seen anything like it... I been owned by cats all my life... but there it is... shaggy paws!

There is another dog out there that needs you. There is another dobie just waiting to BE needed. You and Dee are just as right for that dog, as that dog is right for the two of you. Somehow it's like your spirits just mesh... and you will know. Just keep your heart open.

Cape Cod Doberman Rescue & Assistance
Louise Fournier Perry
P.O. Box 235,
North Truro, MA 02652
(508) 487-9589
louisefperry@comcast.net

Here is a link that might be useful: Cyberdobes Rescue


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RE: Losing a Friend

Oh, Prof. I'm so sorry. There are no words to help you work through the pain of losing a beloved pet. Just know that it is a shared sorrow, one that ultimately falls to those who willingly open their hearts to animal companions. They make us laugh, help us cry, enrich our lives and, ultimately, make us better people. Leather Marie will always be in your heart because she helped make it.
Courage,
Kris


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I'm so sorry, Prof. I noticed you weren't posting much on the other side, now I know why. Pets are so special, the love we share with them is so precious. I'm just getting over losing my pet in February, just about ready to stop putting flowers by her empty cage. :(

I hope you and Dee will be less heartbroken soon. It's a good season for joy and optimism, I hope you feel it soon.


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I'm so sorry to hear about your losses. It's truly difficult to lose a best friend and loving companion. Every pet is so unique and special. I am fostering a beautiful well mannered Staffordshire Terrier who really needs a loving home. She was a neighbors pet who fell on hard times. I have a dog so I can't afford to keep her long term. I know this is a strange way to share her information, but I want to ensure she finds a safe and loving home. Please just look at her adopt a pet page. The link is below labeled Cookie.Thank you

Here is a link that might be useful: Cookie


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